Advice and Relationships Again: A Hypester's Tale

[Thedudehimself]

Well you're probably much better off without her if she's that kind of person.



You think it'd be easier on her if her boyfriend dumped her because she is getting fat?



Just tell her the truth and then leave her the hell alone. I don't care if you think you love her or not, you DON'T. Or you wouldn't have done it at all.

I dont know, I thought it might ve been easier for her. Its not true, though. She looks very good. I think you are right, if there were really love I would not have done it.

I will break up with her. Not ove rthe Internet. I will go to her tommorow and say it straight in her face. Then I will leave forever. I already know that there is anothe rguy who has a crush on her so he can have her then. So she wont be alone.

 

[Dreadstar]

sorry, double post.

 

[Nell2ThaIzzay]

Just tell her the truth and then leave her the hell alone. I don't care if you think you love her or not, you DON'T. Or you wouldn't have done it at all.

This is the truest thing ever said in the history of this thread.

 

[steintym]

Dude, why don't you collect what dignity you have and find someone else?

Seriously ... Referring to something as a "fling" and then going on like this.

 

[Dreadstar]

Seriously ... Referring to something as a "fling" and then going on like this.

But it was the things she did that made me think it was a fling. And it seems I was correct. if she was serious, we could have worked through these issues. To me, it does not matter what you want in life, its how badly you want it and what sacrifices you are willing to make it achieve them.

it seems this woman is not willing to make any and thinks that a man will fit perfectly to her standards.

 

[Erzengel]

 

[steintym]

But it was the things she did that made me think it was a fling. And it seems I was correct. if she was serious, we could have worked through these issues. To me, it does not matter what you want in life, its how badly you want it and what sacrifices you are willing to make it achieve them.

it seems this woman is not willing to make any and thinks that a man will fit perfectly to her standards.

It seems like you cared far more than you let on.

I guess the best thing you can do is learn from this for the next time.

 

[Anita18]

Tell her what you did and then break up so she can find someone who's actually worth her time.

Don't tell her she's fat, that's just mean and immature and stupid. Tell her you don't know why you did it, but you don't want to cause her or yourself any more pain.

Dude, why don't you collect what dignity you have and find someone else?

This is what we've been telling a poster on another forum who's distraught that some guy who she casually dated for 5 months (seeing each other once a month) dumped her without warning. She's thinking of going over to his house to see if there's another woman. The clincher - she is FIFTY.

The truly part? She admitted she found his profile on Adult Friend Finder (okay, she didn't meet him there) and he said he was looking for "discreet relationships." Now she ought to get tested as well as delete the guy from her phone!

And as for fling girl, I knew a girl like that in college. Was gorgeous, always paid attention to her looks, was a perfect kind of trophy girlfriend. But she was picky as all get out. I'd hear stories from my college bf (who lived in the same hall), that she'd start dating someone, then find ONE THING "wrong" with him and then dump him.

I found her on Facebook recently and I was shocked to see she's married! So I guess she got lucky enough to find someone who was perfect. I wonder if she'll dump him if he lost his eyesight or something....A person like that really shouldn't promise themselves to a committed relationship, but it's not unusual for young people to wise up. It might be too late when you've hit your 30s...

 

[Dreadstar]

SO how long does it take to move on? Honestly, I cant go to some places in the city as it reminds me of her and it is too painful. She works downtown and I cant go there, I get really upset. I feel VERY empty inside, it actually hurts. I cant eat or sleep. I have NO energy to do anything. I usually go out with my other comic book friends tonight after our comic store closes to a bar for nachos, but I cant go! I am too down. I was suppose to take her for lunch tomorrow. Oh how I would give anything to be able to do that again!

I am prob going to start to cry tomorrow at noon, as thats when I would meet her at her work and take her out for lunch. I honestly cant take much more of this.

 

[steintym]

This is what we've been telling a poster on another forum who's distraught that some guy who she casually dated for 5 months (seeing each other once a month) dumped her without warning. She's thinking of going over to his house to see if there's another woman. The clincher - she is FIFTY.

Damn, I thought you were talking about my sister-in-law. She's only 40, but otherwise the profile fits her. She pulls crap like that all of the time.

 

[steintym]

SO how long does it take to move on? Honestly, I cant go to some places in the city as it reminds me of her and it is too painful. She works downtown and I cant go there, I get really upset. I feel VERY empty inside, it actually hurts. I cant eat or sleep. I have NO energy to do anything. I usually go out with my other comic book friends tonight after our comic store closes to a bar for nachos, but I cant go! I am too down. I was suppose to take her for lunch tomorrow. Oh how I would give anything to be able to do that again!

I am prob going to start to cry tomorrow at noon, as thats when I would meet her at her work and take her out for lunch. I honestly cant take much more of this.

It could take days, weeks, months, who knows? Each situation will be different.

The best thing to do would be to go out tonight like you normally would. Start to move on and keep doing things you enjoy.

 

[Erzengel]

SO how long does it take to move on? Honestly, I cant go to some places in the city as it reminds me of her and it is too painful. She works downtown and I cant go there, I get really upset. I feel VERY empty inside, it actually hurts. I cant eat or sleep. I have NO energy to do anything. I usually go out with my other comic book friends tonight after our comic store closes to a bar for nachos, but I cant go! I am too down. I was suppose to take her for lunch tomorrow. Oh how I would give anything to be able to do that again!

I am prob going to start to cry tomorrow at noon, as thats when I would meet her at her work and take her out for lunch. I honestly cant take much more of this.

Aren't you 50?

Not that relationship breakups hurt any less any age, but seriously, you have dated before.

 

[Anita18]

SO how long does it take to move on? Honestly, I cant go to some places in the city as it reminds me of her and it is too painful. She works downtown and I cant go there, I get really upset. I feel VERY empty inside, it actually hurts. I cant eat or sleep. I have NO energy to do anything. I usually go out with my other comic book friends tonight after our comic store closes to a bar for nachos, but I cant go! I am too down. I was suppose to take her for lunch tomorrow. Oh how I would give anything to be able to do that again!

I am prob going to start to cry tomorrow at noon, as thats when I would meet her at her work and take her out for lunch. I honestly cant take much more of this.

So...this girl was definitely NOT a fling then.

Depends. It took me about a year to get over my first bf, but we'd dated for 1.5 years and were each other's first loves. Some people just bounce back, too. I have a classmate who broke up with her fiance and then two weeks later found another guy who she's convinced is THE ONE.

It might take you a couple weeks. I think you're the kind of guy who'll bounce back fast. Namely with comic girl and the third prospect.

Damn, I thought you were talking about my sister-in-law. She's only 40, but otherwise the profile fits her. She pulls crap like that all of the time.

What's with all these crazies in their 40s and 50s? Another poster on that forum has a sister-in-law who plans weddings (and post-wedding lives) after she goes on ONE DATE with someone. And even went to Colorado Springs during the wildfires because she was convinced she'd meet a firefighter there and marry him. She returned unmarried.

 

[terry78]

Them spinsters be trippin.

 

[Dreadstar]

Yes, I am 50. I have dated before. But it still hurts and hurts more now because I fear being alone! Thats why I chase all these women, fear!

Honestly, I have not seen or talked to comic chick in 1 week. I am NOT going to our nachos bar thing tonight, so I will not see her. I just cant right now. I am too upset over my fling girl!
GOD how I want her back!!!!!!!!

 

[hopefuldreamer]

I'm still not over my ex and it's been over 4 years

I really believe what they say though, you don't get over someone until you fall in love with someone else. Or at least, it's not easy.

 

[steintym]

My sister-in-law gets involved in all kinds of crazy garbage. She is convinced that talking sex and sending nude photos of herself to guys she just met online is perfectly normal. This is her main way of trying to start a relationship.

... and not to be too mean, but ... she's not exactly a supermodel.

 

[Schlosser85]

I was desperately in love with my ex for at least a year and a half or so after he dumped me.

Looking back, I feel kind of pathetic about it.

But it's a fool who looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart.

 

[Dreadstar]

I am thinking of texting her tonight and asking her for another chance. Tell her I will do anything to change. I will prob start crying. It will prob not work, but what have I got to lose. Then she will ask for her camera back. I will tell her I was taken by surprize and unaware. She says thats part of the problem, I could not see these issues but how am I suppose to see what she subjectively sees as issues unless you communicate them to me!

 

[Nell2ThaIzzay]

I'm still not over my ex and it's been over 4 years

I really believe what they say though, you don't get over someone until you fall in love with someone else. Or at least, it's not easy.

Took me over 3 years and a long distance relapse to get over my first ex. Part of the "getting over" process was finding someone else as well.

Took me a bit to get over that "someone else", even though nothing ever happened between us.

For the girl I just broke up with, I'm having some times where I miss her, but I never really had a problem "getting over" her. Although by this point, we've been broken up for about 2 months when we were only together for 3. But to go back to your point, it probably does help that I've gotten involved with someone else too, so... guess you have a point lol.

 

[Erzengel]

I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound a little insensitive, but my 1st relationship breakup messed with my 2nd relationship. But after that I pretty much put myself out there and didn't dwell on the past.

Sitting at home listening to Air Supply isn't going to change things.

I'm still not over my ex and it's been over 4 years

I really believe what they say though, you don't get over someone until you fall in love with someone else. Or at least, it's not easy.

But you still see him routinely right?

 

[ComicChick]

I am thinking of texting her tonight and asking her for another chance. Tell her I will do anything to change. I will prob start crying. It will prob not work, but what have I got to lose. Then she will ask for her camera back. I will tell her I was taken by surprize and unaware. She says thats part of the problem, I could not see these issues but how am I suppose to see what she subjectively sees as issues unless you communicate them to me!

texting is childish in mature matters like this. i'd say call or don't bother. i wouldn't take it serious if i was her if this exchange occurred via text

 

[Schlosser85]

I would say do it in person.

 

[Dreadstar]

texting is childish in mature matters like this. i'd say call or don't bother. i wouldn't take it serious if i was her if this exchange occurred via text

Good idea, Thanks you.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

Yeah defo no texting.

It's like the worst thing you can do if someones dumped you.

But you still see him routinely right?

No not at all. We don't even live in the same town, and even when we did I saw him maybe twice a year.

Maybe i'm being too hard on myself. I mean, it's not like i've been mooning over him ever since, i've been with plenty of other guys and I don't think about him all that much.

It's just, when I do see him or hear from him, I still feel 'it'. That love just won't go away, no matter how much I focus on how badly things ended.

Like I said though, I think that's a lot to do with the fact that I haven't fallen in love since.

When I do, i'm sure that will pass.