The Dark Knight Rises The Dark Knight Rises Caption Thread - Part 4

[Panthro]

Great stuff guys, gotta love the Ben thing.

BANE: Dammit, I risked my life for Talie, ruined my face and my health for her, and she friendzoned me for life! You betrayed her father and his cause, left him for dead in that crashing train, and she slept with you! Ain´t it always like that, the nice guys are always the friends/big brothers and the chicks go for the bad boys...

BRUCE: Meaning you are the nice guy? You´re a steroid abuser, tatooed, motorcycle-riding bully who snaps people´s backs and necks like they´re toothpicks all the time, installed a half-anarchist, half-fascist regime in Gotham and almost blew up the whole goddamn city!!

BANE: You´re missing the point!! Would it have killed that b**** to be friends with benefits?! An yearly Christmas party hanky panky would be fine!! F***, I´d settle for a Webcam show!!

Bwahahahahaha

All this stuff's great

 

[Mob1423]

Batman: (backs away) WHOA MAN, I said I was sorry!

Bane: IM GONNA F**KING KICK YOUR F**KING ASS MAN, I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS F**KING CITY, YOU PRICK!

Batman: I'm sorry-

Bane: NO, DON'T JUST BE SORRY. THINK FOR ONE F**KING SECOND. Are you the hero Gotham deserves or not?!

Batman: Yes, I am-

Bane: Then why the f**k were you punching me right in my face. BOOM BA DOOM BA DOOM, like this in my mask, what the f**k is it with you?!

Batman: I was just wondering where the trigger was...

Bane: OHHHHHHHH GOOD FOR YOU, and how was it? BECAUSE YOU MADE IT F**KING USELESS NOW!

 

[Panthro]

Batman: (backs away) WHOA MAN, I said I was sorry!

Bane: IM GONNA F**KING KICK YOUR F**KING ASS MAN, I WANT YOU OUT OF THIS F**KING CITY, YOU PRICK!

Batman: I'm sorry-

Bane: NO, DON'T JUST BE SORRY. THINK FOR ONE F**KING SECOND. Are you the hero Gotham deserves or not?!

Batman: Yes, I am-

Bane: Then why the f**k were you punching me right in my face. BOOM BA DOOM BA DOOM, like this in my mask, what the f**k is it with you?!

Batman: I was just wondering where the trigger was...

Bane: OHHHHHHHH GOOD FOR YOU, and how was it? BECAUSE YOU MADE IT F**KING USELESS NOW!

 

[EliteF50]

Great stuff, Mob1423!

 

[KalMart]

Assistant: Mr. Nolan, I have some great news, and some not so great news.

Nolan: Really? Good news first.

Assistant: Well you may to believe this, but we found out that you and Jonah have anther brother that was separated from you at a very young age...we were able to verify that he is.

Nolan: Oh my goodness! Are you serious?

Assistant: Yes..in fact he's waiting downstairs as we speak, eager to meet you and says he can't wait to spend a lot of time with you.

Nolan: My God, I'm overwhelmed...this is incredible. But what's the bad news?

Assistant: ....who it is....

Spoiler

 

[Oscorp]

Bane: "Now that we're finally alone you and I, it is time!"

Bruce: "Oh no...please don't..."

Bane: "I've never had a friend to talk to! It feels like you and I, we understand each other. You're like my long lost brother"

Bruce: "Oh...well...yeah you can talk to me"

Bane: "I saw this pretty woman at a bus stop last Saturday. And I swear she glanced at me not once, but twice or even three times! Do you think she might be...interested in me?"

Bruce: "Yeah uh...she totally was! She must have been! You're a handsome guy after all"

Bane: *sigh of relief* "Thanks man! I mean, I thought that too but it's always better to check with others to make sure"

 

[Oscorp]

Bruce: "I've always wondered...why do you wear that mask? Does it make you stronger, or make you feel less pain or what?"

Bane: "I have bad breath"

Bruce: "Oh..."

 

[Oscorp]

JOKER: "OK guys! You might wonder why I've gathered you to this meeting. Well, to put it simple, we are the most powerful criminals in Gotham. It's time we work together. Nothing would stop us! I say, let's plan a bank robbery together. I have some tubes of laughing gas that I can use on some guards."

RA'S AL GHUL: "Sounds like a plan, Joker! I can bring my assassins with me, they'll be of good use in this operation"

SCARECROW: "I'll scare the crap out of everyone and cause some panic!"

BANE: "I will bring some of my guys with me, too. Then I'll use my pure strenght and simply break their bones"

JOKER: "Awesome guys! What about you Two-Face?"

TWO-FACE: "I'll take every ****ing coin of theirs, and flip 'em!!"

JOKER:.....



EDIT: Sorry for posting so many guys, I'm in a hangover and got nothing better to do. Just tell me if you want me to stop

 

[TheGuy]

Spoiler

Bane: "Now that we're finally alone you and I, it is time!"

Bruce: "Oh no...please don't..."

Bane: "I've never had a friend to talk to! It feels like you and I, we understand each other. You're like my long lost brother"

Bruce: "Oh...well...yeah you can talk to me"

Bane: "I saw this pretty woman at a bus stop last Saturday. And I swear she glanced at me not once, but twice or even three times! Do you think she might be...interested in me?"

Bruce: "Yeah uh...she totally was! She must have been! You're a handsome guy after all"

Bane: *sigh of relief* "Thanks man! I mean, I thought that too but it's always better to check with others to make sure"

Good one.

 

[Oscorp]

Good one.

Thanks!

 

[Panthro]

Funny stuff guys

 

[BlackFox]

Some comedy gold in here!!

 

[Oscorp]

BRUCE: "How am I supposed to fly The Bat? All the instruction says is 'Do a barrel roll!'"

FOX: "Yeah...just do it!"

 

[antovolk]

From the NolanFans meme thread

 

[Mob1423]

MEANWHILE IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE

Actor and Comedian Jim Carrey travels back in time to erase his infamous history of portraying The Riddler in Joel ****moc- I MEAN SCHUMACHER's Batman films. What he didn't know was that he was also erasing so much more that would change history forever.

George Clooney: RUN CHRIS, THAT JOYGASM GUY HAS COME TO ERASE OUR HILARIOUS GLORY!

Chris O' Donnell: HOLY SCHUMACHER SHAME, BATMAN!

Jim Carrey: Mock my comedic genius by making me some f**king green nerd, huh? I'll show him. I'LL SHOW EVERYONE THAT I DESERVE TO BE THE JOKER!

 

[Panthro]

From the NolanFans meme thread

Hehehehehehe

 

[Panthro]

MEANWHILE IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE

Actor and Comedian Jim Carrey travels back in time to erase his infamous history of portraying The Riddler in Joel ****moc- I MEAN SCHUMACHER's Batman films. What he didn't know was that he was also erasing so much more that would change history forever.

George Clooney: RUN CHRIS, THAT JOYGASM GUY HAS COME TO ERASE OUR HILARIOUS GLORY!

Chris O' Donnell: HOLY SCHUMACHER SHAME, BATMAN!

Jim Carrey: Mock my comedic genius by making me some f**king green nerd, huh? I'll show him. I'LL SHOW EVERYONE THAT I DESERVE TO BE THE JOKER!

Hahahahaha

 

[Panthro]

JIM CARREY: "Run my pretties, run!"
ADAM WEST BATMAN: "Gonna Fly Now!"
BURT WARD ROBIN: "Tramps Like Us, Baby We Were Born To Run!"
ADAM WEST BATMAN: "Running With THE Devil!"
BURT WARD ROBIN: "Run Away If You Want To Survive!"

 

[Mob1423]

JIM CARREY: "Run my pretties, run!"
ADAM WEST BATMAN: "Gonna Fly Now!"
BURT WARD ROBIN: "Tramps Like Us, Baby We Were Born To Run!"
ADAM WEST BATMAN: "Running With THE Devil!"
BURT WARD ROBIN: "Run Away If You Want To Survive!"

Hahahahaha that's clever, nice one!

 

[the dmg]

Batman: What's up with the mask over your mouth?

Bane: Real men hide their emotions.

Batman: Why?

Bane: Why? Because it's none of your ****in' business!

 

[Panthro]

Hahahahaha that's clever, nice one!

Thanks.

Funny one dmg

 

[ultimatefan]

Great stuff guys!

BRUCE: Oh, so this was Steve Jobs´ customized Iphone...

 

[ultimatefan]

JIM CARREY: Now I am your puppet master, and you shall do my bidding!!
ADAM WEST BATMAN: Frank Gorshin still was a better Riddler!
JIM CARREY: Go to hell.

 

[Chrisbarnes182]

It's the hard knock life (uh-huh) for us
It's the hard knock life, for us!!
Steada treated, we get tricked
Steada kisses, we get kicked
It's the hard knock life!!

 

[Chrisbarnes182]

Bane: You have been a bad boy.. Go to your room...