The Official "Ask A Brotha" Thread

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We don't take kindly to people who joke around here. It's all about being super cereal.:dry:



It's not the ghetto culture that I hate, but it's when people are proud to be ignorant that pisses me off. We all have our ghetto/country moments no matter what color you are. I can't say that I hate ghetto people inherently, but I hate a lot of people with the ghetto mentality that revel in stupidity like my sister.

What really irks me is that these people always say that what they do is the "real" black experience, but that couldn't be further from the truth. It's like the people who say that hip hop was the first music to define black people. Wrong dumb asses! Jazz and blues was!:cmad:
I think you can see the different types of ghetto-activity in hip hop. You have those who revel in ignorance and shamelessness (hustler rap) and you have those who use black history and street knowledge as a door to a righteous path (underground rap).

The geek that I am can't help but compare the death of hip hop to Star Wars with the Siths driving the Jedi out of power.
 
I think you can see the different types of ghetto-activity in hip hop. You have those who revel in ignorance and shamelessness (hustler rap) and you have those who use black history and street knowledge as a door to a righteous path (underground rap).

The geek that I am can't help but compare the death of hip hop to Star Wars with the Siths driving the Jedi out of power.

The evolution, or de-evolution, of hip hop has always been interesting.

Myself, I see NWAs "Straight Outta Compton" as one of the key change points in urban music and culture, at least from my detached perspective as a Chinese-Canadian in Toronto.
 
Most black guys I know that choose only white women say it's because of the attitude of black women. I think it's a cop out IMO. Just say that's your preference. I prefer black women so I tolerate the attitude! :P

It is sad to me that the stereotype has become that if any black man isn't dating a black woman, he must think that he's too "good" for black women, etc.

It still seems to be very hard for a lot of people to accept that some individuals date based on personality and attractiveness and don't factor race into it. Such a shame - people are people.

I think that it's normal to have preferences, but there are many who make that "preference" a determining factor.
 
It is sad to me that the stereotype has become that if any black man isn't dating a black woman, he must think that he's too "good" for black women, etc.

It still seems to be very hard for a lot of people to accept that some individuals date based on personality and attractiveness and don't factor race into it. Such a shame - people are people.

I think that it's normal to have preferences, but there are many who make that "preference" a determining factor.

Right. I prefer light skin black women. My wife is not light skin. I married for love not preference.
 
Considering we are all supposed to share a common ancestor we are all racial mixed anyways.
 
It is sad to me that the stereotype has become that if any black man isn't dating a black woman, he must think that he's too "good" for black women, etc.

It still seems to be very hard for a lot of people to accept that some individuals date based on personality and attractiveness and don't factor race into it. Such a shame - people are people.

I think that it's normal to have preferences, but there are many who make that "preference" a determining factor.

I agree with that in principle, but in practice it's not so simple, especially when one party on the gender/race spectrum has a lot more power than the other, and uses that power as a bully pulpit to ingratiate themselves into the mainstream while denigrating their counterpart on the race/gender divide.

For example, I think it's cool for black men to date white women, but it's not cool for some black men to then turn around and say black women are terrible.

This phenomenon is very apparent when it comes to black men/women, and Asian women/men. In each case, the former party has a cultural bully pulpit to work from, and more often than not a terribly insulting image of the latter party is propogated from it. The fact is, Oprah notwithstanding, black men have a significantly larger cultural footprint on mainstream America, yet the perceptions and portrayals of black women tend to be either negative or disempowering.

My favorite example is to compare film director Spike Lee and novellist Amy Tan. In terms of how they portray the opposite gender within their own race, they're almost identical in that respect.
 
I think black guys go for white chicks because they believe a white woman a white woman is submissive, the ultimate trophy, a forbidden fruit, and exotic in a nordic sense. It's hard to pass up when a black woman isn't being the obedient pet we expect.
 
I think black guys go for white chicks because they believe a white woman a white woman is submissive, the ultimate trophy, a forbidden fruit, and exotic in a nordic sense. It's hard to pass up when a black woman isn't being the obedient pet we expect.

That's never attracted me though. I want a partner not a servant. I wouldn't have respect for my significant other. And that's not a good thing.
 
I agree with that in principle, but in practice it's not so simple, especially when one party on the gender/race spectrum has a lot more power than the other, and uses that power as a bully pulpit to ingratiate themselves into the mainstream while denigrating their counterpart on the race/gender divide.

For example, I think it's cool for black men to date white women, but it's not cool for some black men to then turn around and say black women are terrible.

This phenomenon is very apparent when it comes to black men/women, and Asian women/men. In each case, the former party has a cultural bully pulpit to work from, and more often than not a terribly insulting image of the latter party is propogated from it. The fact is, Oprah notwithstanding, black men have a significantly larger cultural footprint on mainstream America, yet the perceptions and portrayals of black women tend to be either negative or disempowering.

My favorite example is to compare film director Spike Lee and novellist Amy Tan. In terms of how they portray the opposite gender within their own race, they're almost identical in that respect.

There are definitely black men out there who will blatantly stereotype against black women and state that they won't date them for "insert blanket generalization" reasons. And I equally understand how awful the negative stereotypes against black women are. I can't ever know what it's like to be in the person's shoes who experiences it. But the solution isn't to stereotype against every black man you see dating outside of his race. It definitely isn't simple, yet I see problems arising for interracial couples all the time because of society trying to oversimply and categorize. It's a circle of stereotypes :csad:
 
Black women can be too dominant and men in general want to be the dominant force in the relationship.

I'd like to say it has something to do with slavery and having to be strong to survive but aren't African woman just as dominant?

Either way black men are already are socially castrated by the white establishment, we don't need emasculation from our women too.
 
African women as in women from Africa I wouldn't say are submissive but they are often rather tradionalist in terms of gender roles relationships.

Ultimately in any realtionships its about getting along regardless of the power dynamic of the relationship.
 
This is mainly to those who come from an ancestry of slaver:
Would you still like reparation in the name of your ancestors from those still profiting off their slave-master ancestors' prospects?
 
I'm not sure if this is going to come out right as it makes sense in my head but I'm a first generation in the US. American born and all that, but there is a sense of tradition and culture in my family and stuff like that I've always been okay with.

However, those who beat their chests and wear their ethnicity on their sleeve like they've done something in their lives to earn it? Never got that. :huh:
 
This is mainly to those who come from an ancestry of slaver:
Would you still like reparation in the name of your ancestors from those still profiting off their slave-master ancestors' prospects?
Not from an ancestry of slavery that I know of but why stop there?

Should Jews be suing Germany or Egypt? :huh:

I'm against it, especially if it comes out of my taxes.
 
There's a black girl at my job that I like. One time she approached me outside work and we had a ten minute conversation and we seemed to click. I thought about asking her out but we hardly interact because she has a different job at the airport. Also if I see her she is all business and from I hear she's like that all the time at work.
So there's a older black guy I work with and he asks me what girls I like at the airport and everything. he just does it to mess around but when if I mention her , he'll change the subject quickly. I think he's one of those guys that has issues with interracial relationships but won't say anything. Also there seems to be issues with it around here. A white guy got beaten half to death not too long ago for it.
Another thing is my parents are christian and against it. Oddly neither of these things would stop me but it does make me a bit hesitant because I'm worried how this girl feels about that. Some people won't date outside their race just to avoid issues with their family.


I know most people here don't have problems with interracial dating but how do your parents feel?
 
This is mainly to those who come from an ancestry of slaver:
Would you still like reparation in the name of your ancestors from those still profiting off their slave-master ancestors' prospects?
Not really. If people decended from slaves went around retroactively collecting money from those who profited from slavery it wouldn't help racial relations as I'm sure many white people would resent it and the money made from slavery by now has infiltrated many institutions, companies and people from society.

I don't know where you would begin and how you woulrd track down and prove which ancestors to pay.

Equality of oppertunity, equality of rights and so on is what black society needs. A payout isn't going to change anything.

Slavery is in the past and we should learn the lessons from it but its best to move on and not be a slave to the history of it.
 
This is mainly to those who come from an ancestry of slaver:
Would you still like reparation in the name of your ancestors from those still profiting off their slave-master ancestors' prospects?

I feel reparations should be given to blacks in the form of school vouchers. Black students who excel at school work will be given the best education possible.

This gives the most capable and ambitious black children most the tools they need to empower themselves and thus their community.

Whites in general may hate the idea of reparations but I think they'd accept the school voucher-reparations program over tax money going toward welfare seemingly endlessly. If we have to lose welfare because of the tea party politics I'd hope we could at make up for it with this school-voucher-reparations program.
 
Not from an ancestry of slavery that I know of but why stop there?

Should Jews be suing Germany or Egypt? :huh:

I'm against it, especially if it comes out of my taxes.
It's not like Native Americans got casinos or anything..

oh wait.
 
There's a black girl at my job that I like. One time she approached me outside work and we had a ten minute conversation and we seemed to click. I thought about asking her out but we hardly interact because she has a different job at the airport. Also if I see her she is all business and from I hear she's like that all the time at work.
So there's a older black guy I work with and he asks me what girls I like at the airport and everything. he just does it to mess around but when if I mention her , he'll change the subject quickly. I think he's one of those guys that has issues with interracial relationships but won't say anything. Also there seems to be issues with it around here. A white guy got beaten half to death not too long ago for it.
Another thing is my parents are christian and against it. Oddly neither of these things would stop me but it does make me a bit hesitant because I'm worried how this girl feels about that. Some people won't date outside their race just to avoid issues with their family.


I know most people here don't have problems with interracial dating but how do your parents feel?
Your parents are against interracial dating because they are Christan :huh:
never heard that one before. I've heard of parents not wanting their kids to date outside their faith but never heard of a person say they wouldn't want their child to date someone a different ethnicity because they were christian unless they were Mormon, Amish or something.

My family have told me they would prefer if I married a black girl but have no problem if I didn't as long as I'm happy although it might be a bit awkward as my parents can be a bit un-PC sometimes so when I've had girlfriends of differant races I've had to tell them to watch what they say as it can be embarrassing.
 
And not to mention the massive research to determine who really was descended from slavery. Again, who's going to be responsible for THAT? A government agency? And who's paying that agency? Taxes.
 
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