The Amazing Spider-Man The Spider-Man reboot caption thread - Part 1

[Panthro]

MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: "Do you see what I've been reduced to? I have to give Spider-Man aerial piggy back rides just to get the fans to notice me! Do you have any idea how demeaning this is?!"
SPIDER-MAN: "Hey it was this or pole dancing babe, it could have been much worse."
MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: "From strong willed feminist to Spider-Man's chauffeur... sigh. A girl's gotta eat."

 

[Panthro]

SPIDER-MAN: "Hey I can see my apartment from here!"
MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL [thinking]: "All I have to do is drop him from this height and they'll never be able to pin his mysterious death on me..."

 

[Panthro]

SPIDER-MAN: "Tally Ho, gents! I just traded up from what's her name at the CSI department for this little number here!"

SUPERMAN: "Why the Hell is she hanging out with him, the guy who sold his marriage to the devil?"
BATMAN: "Probably for the same reason Wonder Woman was chasing me back in the DCAU - hoping that hanging around the more iconic & popular character would get more fans to invest in her."
SUPERMAN: "Ouch."

 

[ultimatefan]

MRS CAPTAIN MARVEL: Nope, these bullets can´t tore my costume!
SPIDER-MAN: Aaw nuts!

MRS CAPTAIN MARVEL: Peter, what the hell?!
SPIDER-MAN: I´m sorry, it´s the vibration, I swear! Please don´t drop me!

 

[ultimatefan]

MRS CAPTAIN MARVEL: So Peter, what do I have to do to be a regular in your titles?
SPIDER-MAN: Can you fly around Earth and make time go backwards like Superman, so I´m again married to a super hot lovely woman and I don´t do something as incredibly stupid as losing her in a deal with the devil to save my already octogenarian aunt?
MRS CAPTAIN MARVEL: Hmmm, nope, sorry.
SPIDER-MAN: Dammit! Well, it was worth a shot. Can you dye your hair red?

 

[Panthro]

Great stuff UF. She would look good with red hair.

 

[ultimatefan]

MS. MARVEL [laughing]: Seriously, you guys realize that getting just one girl drunk among four guys, you have a much bigger chance of ending up in bed with each other than me, doncha?!
WOLVERINE: Dibs on Spidey!
SPIDEY: Hey! I´m flattered, but hey!

 

[ultimatefan]

PETER: Did you know some spiders actually play music, using their web as strings?
GWEN: Aw, isn´t that cute. And I take it you plan on doing a cello concert...

 

[Panthro]

Funny stuff UF.

 

[Panthro]

MS. MARVEL [laughing]: "Really guys? You think getting me into a drunken orgy will help get you into the Avengers sequel?! The film rights debacle alone guarantees that most of you will never even have cameos!"
SPIDER-MAN: "Nuts. I wanted to be in Avengers 2. "
LUKE CAGE: "Whines the guy with his own mega-buck franchise."
SPIDER-MAN: "Shut up."

 

[ultimatefan]

MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: So, what would I have to do to be in your reboot sequel?
SPIDER-MAN: Take a number and get in line, sweetie. Black Cat nearly was in two movies and she still missed the boat. Betty Brant was my girlfriend for years in the comics and she barely got three seconds of sexual tension. The least is said about Carlie Cooper, the better.
MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: Hmmm. What would I have to do to climb up on the list?
SPIDER-MAN: Interesting choice of words...

 

[Panthro]

MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: So, what would I have to do to be in your reboot sequel?
SPIDER-MAN: Take a number and get in line, sweetie. Black Cat nearly was in two movies and she still missed the boat. Betty Brant was my girlfriend for years in the comics and she barely got three seconds of sexual tension. The least is said about Carlie Cooper, the better.
MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: Hmmm. What would I have to do to climb up on the list?
SPIDER-MAN: Interesting choice of words...

Hehehehehehehehehehe

Seriously, we are long overdue for some Black Cat action in cinema.

BLACK CAT: "Get me into the next sequel and I'll do all kinds of naughty things to you off panel!"

 

[Panthro]

BLACK CAT: "Okay seriously who do I have to sleep with to get into the next film?"

 

[ultimatefan]

Hehehehe, yeah.

BLACK CAT: The movie is great and all, but hell will freeze over before they let Anne Hathaway do this!

 

[Panthro]

Hehehehe, yeah.

BLACK CAT: The ovie is great and all, but hell will freeze over before they let Anne Hathaway do this!

Hehehe

So true.

BLACK CAT: "And when I get that feeling I need Sexual Healing..."

 

[Mob1423]

Not mine, but I thought this was hysterical

 

[Panthro]

Not mine, but I thought this was hysterical

 

[ultimatefan]

That with The Avengers is a classic.

 

[ultimatefan]

SPIDER-MAN (THINKING): Don´t make a pun with "*****", don´t make a pun with "*****", don´t make a pun with "*****"...

 

[Oscorp]

Not mine, but I thought this was hysterical

Oh my ****ing God this is hilarious hahahahaha!!!

 

[Mob1423]

Scarlet Spider: Hello...I'm Bane

Bane: Oh, not this s**t again

 

[Panthro]

Scarlet Spider: Hello...I'm Bane

Bane: Oh, not this s**t again

Hehehehehehehe

 

[Panthro]

SPIDER-MAN (THINKING): Don´t make a pun with "*****", don´t make a pun with "*****", don´t make a pun with "*****"...

 

[>>>venom<<<]

edit

 

[Panthro]

SPIDER-MAN: "You know they really should have made more of an effort to differentiate the blue-black in our suits. We're starting to blend together like a single entity." [pause] "That came out wrong."
MS-CAPTAIN-MARVEL: "Shut up Pete."