Confession is good for the Hype. - - - Part 12

[Bruce Banner]

It doesn't matter which city you live in, but what kind of career or life you choose for yourself.

You can have a boring job but have cool hobbies. A few guys I know in their 30s and 40s with pretty boring desk jobs go on long-haul trips on their motorcycles. Of course they aren't married, though. It's pretty rare to have a partner who's willing to go on crazy adventures with you.

If you want a family, there's always postponing the crazy adventures until after the kids go to college. I never know which country my aunt and uncle are on any given day. That does require money though...

Very good points, Anita.
Good thing I don't have any intentions to get married anytime soon nor do I want to be a dad.

I guess my fear is that for me growing older is I'll grow lazy and lack the "youthful" enthusiasm and drive to push forward to get what I want.

 

[Anubis]

He's a writer, so, either it's years of starving trying to write the next great American novel, become a sellout and churn out 3 or 4 thrillers a year for millions of bucks, or get a job as a junior editor for some publishing company.

Or, you know, there is a thriving male prostitute industry in the NYC.....so I hear.

 

[Bruce Banner]

He's a writer, so, either it's years of starving trying to write the next great American novel, become a sellout and churn out 3 or 4 thrillers a year for millions of bucks, or get a job as a junior editor for some publishing company.

Or, you know, there is a thriving male prostitute industry in the NYC.....so I hear.

How'd you know? Or does Anubis just have the lowdown on everyone?

I've been thinking about being an English teacher in Europe. Or the editor route. My old editor is now doing that in Washington and I could see what connections she has.

Sadly, I don't think I'm handsome enough to be a male prostitute by New York Cities standards regardless of how much I work out.

 

[Anubis]

I'm Anubis. I know everything. except that which I don't.

 

[E-Man]

I'm Anubis. I know everything. except that which I don't.

If you know everything, then you should know that I'm creating a booty ray that would make all flat booties nice and round. It will bring about world peace.

 

[Warhammer]

Only if you let it.

I know couples who haven't exactly come from ideal family relationships.

Also have you had a meaningful relationship with someone?

Yeah, some people go through that and rather than keep the cycle going, they work harder to make it work.

But that takes effort and I'd rather not bother myself.

My husband's parents are divorced, and you wouldn't know it until he told you. But his mom has had a happy 10-year marriage going with his stepdad (which befuddles him because they bicker a lot, but it's shallow bickering ) and his dad doesn't seem to care anymore about relationships at all. So that's kind of something, I suppose....

Divorce doesn't have to be the horrible thing it's perceived to be. What makes it horrible are when the two exes feel the need to be horrible to each other, during and after the marriage, and I put the blame solely on those two people. Surely they are adults and can act like adults, but from most of the divorces you see, the complete opposite is true. One of my aunts is going through an ugly custody battle that's been going on years and years (it's so bad, her own daughter cut off contact with her and thus our family) and it's ruining multiple families because of course the other side of the family won't talk to our side at all and we're being deprived of knowing our own cousins. People seriously need to grow up, IMO.

It REALLY helps when divorced parents put aside their differences to put their kid first. Yes, my husband had to move his mom and his dad's when he was little, but he seems to have come out of it completely unscathed. As far as I know, I'm his first long-term relationship (we've been together 5 years) and he has absolutely no issues with commitment.

So you don't have to let it define you if you don't want to. It's your choice, although you have to be aware of recognizing the trouble signs and know how to communicate well. Divorce isn't horrible. People being horrible to each other is horrible.

Thank you for the positive words. Everything that was said is correct. However, after the past two days, what I have been observing in this house with my mother and her husband has been hell. It pains me to see both of angry. My mother confided in me and told me that next year, they are getting a divorce. It's just a complicated, multi-layered situation that'd take me all day to discuss.

During times like these, it's a trickle down effect. I see my mother in there looking like hell due to the stress, the arguing, and (etc) and it makes me feel depressed and helpless. It is toxic. I don't want to be here, but well...I'm a college student who can't exactly just roll out and get an apartment tomorrow.

Also have you had a meaningful relationship with someone?

No, I haven't. Not one time. I will admit that 50% of the time, the opportunity just never presented itself. But the other half, it's intimidating. I know that makes me sound like a puss, but it's what I am perceiving as the truth at this moment.

 

[Anita18]

Very good points, Anita.
Good thing I don't have any intentions to get married anytime soon nor do I want to be a dad.

I guess my fear is that for me growing older is I'll grow lazy and lack the "youthful" enthusiasm and drive to push forward to get what I want.

That's up to you.

My parents are in their 60s and retired but they haven't stopped doing what they love. And they haven't stopped learning. My mom's currently annoyed because my dad wants to encroach on her crafting space with new computers that he wants to test his cloud-computing algorithm on.

It's not a surprise that I grew up a nerd who thought reading encyclopedias (and now Wikipedia) is a fun thing to do in one's free time.

You should be currently nurturing that love of learning and doing things, so you get used to it and it's a no-brainer for when you can no longer rely on your youthful vigor.

 

[Anita18]

Thank you for the positive words. Everything that was said is correct. However, after the past two days, what I have been observing in this house with my mother and her husband has been hell. It pains me to see both of angry. My mother confided in me and told me that next year, they are getting a divorce. It's just a complicated, multi-layered situation that'd take me all day to discuss.

During times like these, it's a trickle down effect. I see my mother in there looking like hell due to the stress, the arguing, and (etc) and it makes me feel depressed and helpless. It is toxic. I don't want to be here, but well...I'm a college student who can't exactly just roll out and get an apartment tomorrow.

No, I haven't. Not one time. I will admit that 50% of the time, the opportunity just never presented itself. But the other half, it's intimidating. I know that makes me sound like a puss, but it's what I am perceiving as the truth at this moment.

You don't have to go into detail here, but lemme tell you, a relationship depends entirely on the two individual people involved. What kind of relationships you've had before, or the relationships that you've witnessed, that doesn't affect your current relationship unless you let it. If you despair because of your past baggage, it will affect your relationship, but it doesn't have to. We are not fated to repeat the relationship mistakes of the people we know, because each relationship is a different combination of people. That's all.

You have to take it one relationship at a time, one day at a time. A relationship should be a bubble where you work out your issues together, and be protected from everything else outside. You need to nurture it and protect what you have with this other person.

But being witness to a failing relationship (especially a marriage) IS toxic. It's not unreasonable to feel stressed being in the middle of it. So that sucks, and I feel for you about that.

 

[Erzengel]

No, I haven't. Not one time. I will admit that 50% of the time, the opportunity just never presented itself. But the other half, it's intimidating. I know that makes me sound like a puss, but it's what I am perceiving as the truth at this moment.

I'll be honest with you, regardless of what you witness from family and friends, your relationship will always be another experience entirely. It's VERY different looking out as opposed to looking in.

Don't be gun shy about dating just because your family has had issues.

 

[Anubis]

If you know everything, then you should know that I'm creating a booty ray that would make all flat booties nice and round. It will bring about world peace.

But you will forget to carry the 1 and cause all booties to explode. You will then be torn apart by a mob of assless death worshipers from Hoboken, New Jersey.

 

[Erzengel]

I never realized how much an intolerant, selfish a'hole Santa is in Rudolph cartoon.

 

[MrMaooz]

I confess that if I were to make a Star Wars movie, I'd be very tempted to have a light-saber fight every 5 minutes.

 

[Warhammer]

But being witness to a failing relationship (especially a marriage) IS toxic. It's not unreasonable to feel stressed being in the middle of it. So that sucks, and I feel for you about that.

Yeah, let's just say I'm in a very dark place right now. Life is about to change feel fast. For as abrupt as the argument happened, it revealed how much of the marriage was a ticking time bomb. By January 1st, it is very likely that many things are going to change.

It just sucks because the selfish part of me is thinking that I don't deserve this. I'm about to have to step up in a way I never thought I had to, but hey, s*** happens. Life's a b****.

I'll be honest with you, regardless of what you witness from family and friends, your relationship will always be another experience entirely. It's VERY different looking out as opposed to looking in.

Don't be gun shy about dating just because your family has had issues.

Yes sir, I hope so. Honestly, down the road, a goal of mine is to never get a divorce. No child deserves a broken family.

 

[Anita18]

Yeah, let's just say I'm in a very dark place right now. Life is about to change feel fast. For as abrupt as the argument happened, it revealed how much of the marriage was a ticking time bomb. By January 1st, it is very likely that many things are going to change.

It just sucks because the selfish part of me is thinking that I don't deserve this. I'm about to have to step up in a way I never thought I had to, but hey, s*** happens. Life's a b****.

What do you mean by "step up?" Do you have younger siblings you have to shield from the mess that is your parents' marriage?

Honestly, if your parents are pulling you into this, they shouldn't do that. It's their marriage, and their problem. There's nothing you can do about it. It is not your fault.

You're right - you don't deserve that. You shouldn't have to pick sides. That's just totally unfair if your parents are asking you to do that.

Yes sir, I hope so. Honestly, down the road, a goal of mine is to never get a divorce. No child deserves a broken family.

Again, a divorce doesn't have to mean a broken family. When my husband's mom remarried, she didn't ditch her son or her ex-husband. He didn't have to choose sides. Instead, he gained another father. He actually wouldn't be the man he is today without him.

The entire family actually gets together for Thanksgiving every year, and the ex-husband even helps out with his former father-in-law. Nothing's broken, it's just shifted and the love has even expanded outward. It really is one big happy family. It IS possible, but you have to have the right priorities - children first and your own future, not your ego.

Honestly, if you think that you'll only go into a marriage adamant that you'll never divorce, you might never marry or have a family. (That is, if you believe you should marry before having children, which I think you do because you fear a broken family, and a relationship that is not legally bound can be broken at absolutely any time.) Because you just don't know what your relationship will hold or how you or your partner might change. And I'm friends with someone in an extremely unhappy marriage, but she refuses to divorce. It is just as ugly, maybe even moreso because she feels trapped and there's nothing she can do legally to even make her husband provide financial support for his own children.

Between an unhappy marriage or a happy divorce, I'd go for the divorce. But ether way, you have to be adamant that you'll act like mature adults no matter what happens down the road.

I confess that if I were to make a Star Wars movie, I'd be very tempted to have a light-saber fight every 5 minutes.

Heck, the whole movie should be a light-saber fight. :

 

[Spider-Aziz]

I confess that if I were to make a Star Wars movie, I'd be very tempted to have a light-saber fight every 5 minutes.

It will be more entertaining than The Phantom menace, until the fights get old
maybe 40 minutes in

 

[Darkness Falls]

i've been having too many fanboy moments in public lately

 

[Black Narcissus]

Mr. Tommie Lee Jones is quite simply the most grizzled of our movie veterans. I saw him recently growing squash and becoming increasingly agitated over the ordeal. I walked up to him and offered to help. That's when I saw it: a neck and backside scarred terribly by years of punishment and neglect at the hands of his producers and directors. His eyes betrayed a soul that was already damned and no amount of repentance would change things. Left to till these marginal squash fields, Mr. Lee Jones will toil in his own little corner of Hell forever.

 

[enterthemadness]

Mr. Tommie Lee Jones is quite simply the most grizzled of our movie veterans. I saw him recently growing squash and becoming increasingly agitated over the ordeal. I walked up to him and offered to help. That's when I saw it: a neck and backside scarred terribly by years of punishment and neglect at the hands of his producers and directors. His eyes betrayed a soul that was already damned and no amount of repentance would change things. Left to till these marginal squash fields, Mr. Lee Jones will toil in his own little corner of Hell forever.

So not true. Tommy Lee Jones lets no man put his hands on him.

B for effort though.

 

[SpideyVille]

I would just like to confess that I am a wee bit drunk, and I hate myself for it. ... Never again =(

 

[enterthemadness]

I would just like to confess that I am a wee bit drunk, and I hate myself for it. ... Never again =(

Then stop drinking wine while you watch Cougar Town on TBS .

 

[KevanG]

It's not drinking, it is known as 'experiencing' the wine.

 

[SpideyVille]

I think I took a few too many shots of Tequila that night. And what bothers me the most about it is that I never drink, but I only did as much as I did because of my friend, who also shouldn't be drinking because she has alcohol problems, and we both had work the next morning. I'm just glad no one from my family saw just how much I drank in a short time span.

 

[Spider-Aziz]

Mr. Tommie Lee Jones is quite simply the most grizzled of our movie veterans. I saw him recently growing squash and becoming increasingly agitated over the ordeal. I walked up to him and offered to help. That's when I saw it: a neck and backside scarred terribly by years of punishment and neglect at the hands of his producers and directors. His eyes betrayed a soul that was already damned and no amount of repentance would change things. Left to till these marginal squash fields, Mr. Lee Jones will toil in his own little corner of Hell forever.

Welcome back Sammy boy

Maybe that explains why the Lee dude barely smiles

So not true. Tommy Lee Jones lets no man put his hands on him.

B for effort though.

These are comic relief confessions
Don't take any bit of it seriously

 

[Fallen Angel]

Oh i shouldn't have seen this thread how long have you folks got?

 

[Lily Adler]

I confess I didn't think Seth would kill off Brian on Family Guy.