Equint and DL bring you..........Pick-up lines for psychos!!!

[Alpha and Omega]

Can I watch you pee?

 

[Bad Superman]

"Relax now, I'm going to spend some time drilling in your mouth."

 

[The Lizard]

"Would you like to read some of my Harry Potter slash fiction?"

 

[DOG LIPS]

You must be this tall...

(Hand gesture her exact height)

..to ride the me.

 

[Bad Superman]

"You don't look well. I'll take your temperature, but left my oral thermometer at home. We'll improvise."

 

[DOG LIPS]

Hi, I'm foreign. I've got Russian hands and Roman fingers.

 

[Alpha and Omega]

Will a 6-pack and a cheeseburger make you forget that I'm here?

 

[Bad Superman]

"Do you like chips? Cause I'm Frito Lay."

 

[DOG LIPS]

Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.

 

[Bad Superman]

"Hey baby, can I tickle your belly button from the inside?"

 

[DOG LIPS]

They call me "coffee". I grind so fine.

 

[Ultimate_Superman]

This is a classic thread.

 

[Alpha and Omega]

So, if we start dating, would you mind doing a few things to help me pay off my student loans? Oh, it's nothing major, just a camera here or there,

*gibberish* . . . after the dp, and everything will work out.

 

[Sava]

If I flip this coin, what are the chances of me getting head tonight?

 

[Alpha and Omega]

So, when is no really NO in your opinion and how many dates will it take me to get past this silly inconvenience?

 

[Mr. Credible]

i like telling girlfriends:

my love for you is like that of a mongoose fighting a cobra.

 

[Mr. Credible]

Can I watch you pee?

actually, the worst one i've heard was off of some website, forget where, but it goes:

"um... excuse me miss, can i pee in our butt"

man... it sounds even dirtier when you type it.

 

[Sava]

You're like a championship bass, I don't know if I should mount you or eat you

 

[Alpha and Omega]

You like to adopt pets and my trouser snake needs a home, so what do you say?

 

[Mr. Credible]

also, the most outrageous pick up line i've ever used (that worked) was:


(i was really tossed at some party when i tried this)

me: "hey... how's it goin? you uh, you wanna' get drunk and rape eachother?"

random girl replies: "but i'm already pretty drunk"

i say: "yeah, me too"

and then it was on like donkey kong. no lie.

 

[The Lizard]

"You seem familiar -- are you a poster on SuperheroHype.com?"

 

[DOG LIPS]

"You seem familiar -- are you a poster on SuperheroHype.com?"

That one will get you:

A. Kicked in the groin.

B. Punched in the throat.

or

C. Lots of sex.

 

[Equint77]

"You seem familiar -- are you a poster on SuperheroHype.com?"

By the way my screenname is ISEXBATMAN.... wanna RPG with me?

 

[Alpha and Omega]

actually, the worst one i've heard was off of some website, forget where, but it goes:

"um... excuse me miss, can i pee in our butt"

man... it sounds even dirtier when you type it.

 

[Alpha and Omega]

I know that this is the first time we've spoken, but I've been following you for days. . . you sure do like to shop a lot. Maybe we could go together next time and I could show you off. . . or vice versa. You don't mind letting me borrow a few bucks do you? Thanks.