Gymrats & Stalkers: "I Was Assaulted In A Public Restroom"

[knowsbleed]

Pouty lips...

always works.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

You're killing us here, LS. We obviously wanna hear you two "resolve" this issue between the sheets.

j/k Your idea to talk to him is probably the best course.

The fact you literally break off from the sexual tension, sit him down, and explain your position (Tell him you just got out of a long relationship, and you're not really looking for games or experimentation), it will definitely impart the idea you're not looking to be someone's stepping stone.

 

[Marx]

Pouty lips...

always works.

No. Lightning needs to stand his ground...not kiss up to the guy.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

Yep, I'm with Marx on this one.

Stand tall, don't budge. If he's really willing to be with you, he'll understand your position, and talk about it.

If he freaks out and just leaves, then it's a whole other situation.

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

If he freaks out and just leaves, then it's a whole other situation.

No.

If he freaks out and leaves then it's over before it's even begun.

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

He ia already on his way...and is probably like 5 or 10 minutes away. It's too late to turn him away now. But I sent him a text and said that I was angry with him and that when he gets here we need to talk. He has not responded.

 

[Marx]

It is entirely possible to be stern without pressuring as well.

 

[Schlosser85]

I it's VERY important to keep in mind that Jason is in the process of accepting to himself that he's attracted to a man. You can't expect him to just jump into everything immediately, especially being a bottom.

TOO MUCH INFORMATION YAWNS BEFORE YOU:

Spoiler

The very idea of being a bottom scared me to death and it was over a year before Mark and I "went there".

Then again, we did do "other stuff", so I can understand Caliph's, um, "tension".

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

I it's VERY important to keep in mind that Jason is in the process of accepting to himself that he's attracted to a man. You can't expect him to just jump into everything immediately, especially being a bottom.

TOO MUCH INFORMATION YAWNS BEFORE YOU:

Spoiler

The very idea of being a bottom scared me to death and it was over a year before Mark and I "went there".

Then again, we did do "other stuff", so I can understand Caliph's, um, "tension".

He doesn't have bottom. Nor do I. To me, we're not even there yet anyway. I mean, eventually someone is gonna have to give and the other will have to receive. But that's the furthest thing from my mind now. We need to establish if these dates are actually meaning something for him emotionally, or are they just leading to some sort of Super****e-O one night stand? Because if it's the latter I'm not interested...

...I don't care how hot he is.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

He ia already on his way...and is probably like 5 or 10 minutes away. It's too late to turn him away now. But I sent him a text and said that I was angry with him and that when he gets here we need to talk. He has not responded.

You're doing the right thing, no worries.

It is entirely possible to be stern without pressuring as well.

I find pressure weeds out those with an individuality, so I can find ones who are subserviant and just do what I want is not for the best.

 

[Schlosser85]

Well I wasn't just talking about the sexual aspect, but the relationship in general. He's probably still pretty conflicted inside about his sexuality, and struggling to go for what he wants and being terrified by it. It seems to me like he's making progress each day you spend with him though, you said yourself he had no hesitation kissing you this time.

But yes, it's good that you're making sure he wants a relationship from you, and not some goal to reach to come to terms with his orientation.

 

[Lightning Strykez!]

*sigh*

I will talk to you guys at some point tommorrow. It's time for me to go.

 

[LouFerignoDemon]

Good luck.
I'm sure it'll be fine.

 

[Hound55]

I was about to say some stuff down the same line Schlosser seems to be taking.

You have to understand that "experimentation" and "using you" are not the same thing.

He's trying to find his own level, in my opinion he's trying too hard to find his level too fast... probably because he IS interested in you.

To me... I just think he's absolutely f***ing terrified of what "it will mean". And as hard as it could be for you your options are to bare with him and be patient (which means opening yourself up even more and putting yourself at risk to be really hurt if he is merely looking to experiment... which I doubt is the case - I don't know too many guys who would think "Hey, I'm going to try to go f*** that guy over there... you know... to see if I'm gay...") and understand that this guy is going to act in ways that would generally be perceived as selfish and prick-like if they were to take place with an experienced bi or gay partner.

But you still need to stand up for yourself at the same time. So you need to tell him how its making you feel when this happens whilst trying to keep from pressuring him (because that could see him piss off because he doesn't want to jerk you around if he actually cares for you or because he thinks you're "too high maintenance" if he's the kind of person who doesn't take criticism well).

The best thing you could do is let him know that this stuff hurts and that you understand that he's not going to be able to just jump straight into this, mentioning that its probably best for both of you if he doesn't try so hard to move things along quickly, and to let him know that if he's serious about this that you're willing to support him in this...

That's just what I'm making out of this though and make of it what you will, because honestly I'm probably the least qualified person to give relationship advice to people of ANY orientation.

 

[AndThePickles]

Haha, LS's last story made me feel like I was reading erotica at work

 

[mrvlknight21]

Well its about 10 hrs since his last post...I expect an update.

 

[enterthemadness]

Haha, LS's last story made me feel like I was reading erotica at work

The man could probably write some good books if he wanted.

Well its about 10 hrs since his last post...I expect an update.

Maybe he is napping...

 

[Schlosser85]

Maybe they're having sex.

 

[Darthphere]

LS, can I option your story for a screenplay I'm writing for the Lifetime Movie Network?

 

[Gilpesh]

LS, can I option your story for a screenplay I'm writing for the Lifetime Movie Network?

But.... but.... there's no women over coming adversity or an abusive relationship in that story!

 

[Darthphere]

Women love teh gayz though.

 

[Gilpesh]

Then why in one of those cheesetastic hallmark holiday movies.... was the bad guy gay?

Answer that!

 

[Darthphere]

Lifetime >>>> Hallmark.

 

[Gilpesh]

I have been defeated....

 

[enterthemadness]

I have been defeated....

There is a God.