The Dark Knight Rises The Dark Knight Rises Caption Thread - Part 4

[Panthro]

thanks mack

BATMAN: "Gimme some sugar baby."

 

[Dark Sentinel]

Great stuff

ALFRED: I sense... no silicon at all. A good solid C-cup. Great firmness, very smooth and symmetrical. No birth marks, no visible veins, no inadequate or unhealthy protuberances or depressions. Caramel-colored nipples, small... but very sensitive.
SELINA: Wow. Just... wow.

And now the Caine Transcription:

Auai sanse... nao siwicon at'aw. A good solid C-cup. Great fehmness, very smoove an' symmetricow. No birf marks, no visibo veins, no inadequate or unhealfy protuvrences or depreshans. Caramel-colahed nippoes, small... but very sansitive.

 

[Panthro]

"Keaton Batman To The Rescue!"

 

[ultimatefan]

Great stuff guys.

I´m Batman, mate!

And I´m a bloody good friend!

And I´m your lovely shire Spider-Man, my good lads!

 

[Panthro]

Hehehe, oh those British Superheroes...

BRUCE: "Hmm, I wonder whatever happened to my old pal Wally West..."

 

[JawZ270589]

Bane : So you come back to DIE with your city?!!

Batman : No! I come back to RETURN SOME VIDEO TAPES!

 

[Polaris23]

Bootleg images.

 

[Just_Human]

- " Hey, nice uniform; can I wear it ? "
- " no way "
- " I want to become a cop later "
- " you a cop ? please .... you dont have what it takes .... besides you are a smart kid ..... you can have a much better job "
- " Are you trying to keep me away from the police ? I dont care, I will be a cop "
- " yeah well, we'll see .... you a cop .. you would be a disgrace to the uniform............... buahahahaha "

A few years later .........



- " what now ? "
- " impossible !
- " lol on top of that you are a postman now ? "

 

[Panthro]

- " Hey, nice uniform; can I wear it ? "
- " no way "
- " I want to become a cop later "
- " you a cop ? please .... you dont have what it takes .... besides you are a smart kid ..... you can have a much better job "
- " Are you trying to keep me away from the police ? I dont care, I will be a cop "
- " yeah well, we'll see .... you a cop .. you would be a disgrace to the uniform............... buahahahaha "

A few years later .........



- " what now ? "
- " impossible !
- " lol on top of that you are a postman now ? "

That's great

 

[Panthro]

BANE: "You know who'd be perfect for you in the next reboot?"

BRUCE: "Don't say Shia Labouef."

BANE: "Oh no, oh no no no, I think we all know the most perfectly logical choice to play you in the next reboot is... Rupert Grint."

BATMAN: "Alright, now you're just trying to piss me off!"

BATMAN: "I'm not doing the T4 rant you hear me?!"

 

[ultimatefan]

Great stuff, especially the Seinfeld one.

BATMAN: How about reenacting that licking scene from Batman Returns?
CATWOMAN: I dunno, how about reenacting the clawing your gut one?
BATMAN: Yeah, that too.
CATWOMAN: Perv.

 

[ultimatefan]

SUPERMAN: But Bruce, how come you didn´t go for Bane´s mask in your first fight?

BATMAN: I didn´t know what the mask did. For all I knew, it was a symbol, like Joker´s make-up or my own mask. Remember, even the CIA agent questioned Bane about the mask and he answered cryptically.

SUPERMAN: And how come he left you with a doctor in the pit and you recovered so quickly?

BATMAN: Remember, I didn´t have a spinal chord injury like in Knightfall, it was an exposed vertebrae, a prison is gonna have a guy who knows how to pop a bone back in place. It´s not like I had Doctor House performing brain surgery with robots on me. And it wasn´t that easy, I spent months recovering in that pit.

SUPERMAN: But how did you get back to Gotham without any money, and so soon?

BATMAN: In BB, I spent seven years travelling all over the world and I didn´t have money either, that wasn´t my first rodeo. And it took me three weeks.

SUPERMAN: Okay, but how did you survive the nuclear fusion reactor explosion?

BATMAN: I had fixed The Bat´s autopilot. The reactor had a destruction range of six miles, a distance that souped up chopper could cover in very little time. I had an escape pod in my frikking car, you think I wouldn´t have something similar in a flying machine?

SUPERMAN: Okay, okay, fine, but how did you...

BATMAN: Clark, for the last time, stop going to these fanboy message boards. How these people manage to waste so much time with those petty arguments, that´s a "plot hole" that has no answer...

 

[Panthro]

Funny stuff UF

SUPERMAN: "But how did John Blake know you were Bruce Wayne?"
BATMAN: "He reads people very well."

SUPERMAN: "So I hear the Perks of Being A Wallflower only got a limited release."
BATMAN: "I know. Surprising given it was based on a critically acclaimed book and stars Emma Watson of the Harry Potter franchise. You'd think the studio would want to capitalize on her and the perception of being her first big post-Potter project."
SUPERMAN: "Meh, it's a movie about angst ridden teens, it's not that unique an experience."
BATMAN: "That's shallow Clark."
SUPERMAN: "Says the guy who actually paid money to go see Wolverine Origins."
BATMAN: "Shut up."

 

[Panthro]

SUPERMAN: "You know hitting 100 issues used to be a badge of honor, now it's seen as a kiss of death. What happened?"
BATMAN: "Continuity, basically. No one wants to deal with it. Fans don't want to deal with it. Writers, artists and editors don't want to deal with it, and sales being what they are now they're afraid that fans of all ages will feel turned off by the big numbers like they'll be walking into an adventure they won't understand, etc."

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks anbd great stuff. That´s part of why the industry is more and more about creator-owned stuff and graphic novels. Stories with a beginning, a middle and an end, a consistent creator´s vision...

BRUCE: I really need a bigger codpiece.

 

[Panthro]

Thanks anbd great stuff. That´s part of why the industry is more and more about creator-owned stuff and graphic novels. Stories with a beginning, a middle and an end, a consistent creator´s vision...

BRUCE: I really need a bigger codpiece.

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks a lot!

BRUCE: Don´t look at me like that!

 

[Panthro]

BATMAN: "I wonder how long I have to wait until my next reboot..."

 

[dnno1]

 

[ultimatefan]

hehehehehe, that Gangnam style phenomen is hilariously bizarre...

SUPERMAN: Happy? Rumor is your beloved Frank Miller will be involved with the JL movie.
BATMAN: C´mon Clark, he hasn´t been my "beloved" Frank Miller since Batman Vs. Spawn. And it only got worse from there.

 

[ultimatefan]

BATMAN: Hmmm faging a hong kiff unger all ffis ffreezimg golb waff a bag iggea.
CATWOMAN: Yeahg, by fongue if fdugk.
BATMAN: Fdill woth if.
CATWOMAN: Fottahhy woth it.

 

[Panthro]

Funny stuff UF

BATMAN: "Who has time to worry about stupidly stupid events like Avengers Vs. X-Men when they've got a hot babe in their arms?"

 

[ultimatefan]

hehehehehe

Superman: So Bruce, have you seen my Superman Vs. The Elite animated feature? Pretty good, huh?

Batman: You mean the one where you´re basically Elvis Presley fighting Johnny Rotten?

Superman: Exactly.

 

[Panthro]

hehehehehe

Superman: So Bruce, have you seen my Superman Vs. The Elite animated feature? Pretty good, huh?

Batman: You mean the one where you´re basically Elvis Presley fighting Johnny Rotten?

Superman: Exactly.

Bwahahahaha

SUPERMAN: "So Wolverine's an Avenger now in addition to being an X-Man and headmaster of his own school named after the dead lady he used to pine for."
BATMAN: "I can't even begin to explain all the things that are wrong with that development."

 

[VenomShock]