The Official Superman Reboot Caption Thread

[Panthro]

SUPERMAN: "Why do you wear your underwear outside your pants? Why do you wear your underwear outside your pants? Do you have any idea how f***ing sick and tired I am of hearing that damn question? Have you all forgotten that when I was created, it was the beginning of a new genre, a new era in fiction, of super human fiction? They changed it to a black suit with a silver S, the fan-boys complained! They changed it to an electric blue & white suit by turning me into a being of pure electrical energy, the f***ing fan-boys complained! I'm arguably the most iconic superhero ever created, and I did it all wearing my f***ing underwear outside of my f***ing pants!"

GREEN LANTERN: "I warned you me and my posse would feck you up if you didn't pay me the money you owed me!"
SUPERMAN: "Bruce, this is the last time I ever help you when you haven't paid off your debts!"
BATMAN: "Shut up Clark!"

 

[COMPO]

Brandon Routh: (singing) Here I am BRANDON ROUTH, I want to be Supeeerman, in the new mooovie, look I've even got.... a uniform.
Executive: (singing) Sorry, Rouutthh, ya had your chaaaance. No please, leeeave my offiiccce, go back to Scott Pilllgrim with your Bloooond hairrr.

 

[COMPO]

WONDER WOMAN: So Clark, do you like my new costume?

SUPERMAN: I'm just glad Lois kept hers.

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks Panthro! Great stuff guys! I see that my yellow Wolverine costume cap inspired you!

 

[ultimatefan]

WELLING: Hah, my show is nearing ten seasons, yours lasted what, four seasons?
CAIN: Yeah, but I married Lois!
WELLING: Oh that´s right, that´s what got you cancelled in the first place!
CAIN: Go to hell.

 

[Panthro]

Thanks Panthro! Great stuff guys! I see that my yellow Wolverine costume cap inspired you!

Yes it did.

WELLING: Hah, my show is nearing ten seasons, yours lasted what, four seasons?
CAIN: Yeah, but I married Lois!
WELLING: Oh that´s right, that´s what got you cancelled in the first place!
CAIN: Go to hell.

 

[COMPO]

CAIN: You don't deserve to put on that suit? I made that suit!!1
WELLING: Your mother made that suit!
CAIN: So did yours!
WELLING: Yeah but I didn't have to do it in a Bonny Tyler Montage!
CAIN: Okay, first you were dead now...
WELLING: Don't worry I'll tell it to the cleaning lady on monday
CAIN: Oh don't rope me in with Routh!

 

[\S/uperman]

WELLING: Hah, my show is nearing ten seasons, yours lasted what, four seasons?
CAIN: I was on a huge network, big difference. 10 million viewers in one show. Do you even average than many viewers in a full year?
WELLING: HOW DARE YOU ASK ME TO DO MATH

 

[Panthro]

WELLING: Hah, my show is nearing ten seasons, yours lasted what, four seasons?
CAIN: I was on a huge network, big difference. 10 million viewers in one show. Do you even average than many viewers in a full year?
WELLING: HOW DARE YOU ASK ME TO DO MATH

 

[Panthro]

Gotta love those Tom Welling Vs. Dean Cain captions.

SUPERMAN: "Is this the part where I do the pagan god/deposed tyrant speech from the Tick?"

GREEN LANTERN: "You will drink the green sperm of my vengeance!"
SUPERMAN: "This is all your fault, Bruce!"
BATMAN: "How the Hell is this my fault?!"
SUPERMAN: "Spring Break, 1987, Hal Jordan. You never called him back!"
BATMAN: "Shut up Clark!"

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks Panthro, great stuff!

SUPERMAN: What my direction in comics means? It means whenever a plummer can´t unclog a toilet. I´ll be there! Whenever someone spends two hours beng pushed over by the call center trying to cancel their long distance plan and the call connection falls, I´ll be there! Whenever someone gets a computer worm that erases all files after downloading what they thought were naked pictures of Megan Fox using the company computer, I´ll be there!

 

[ultimatefan]

A fan´s reaction to the prospect of Chris Columbus directing the Superman film reboot.

 

[Panthro]

Thanks Panthro, great stuff!

SUPERMAN: What my direction in comics means? It means whenever a plummer can´t unclog a toilet. I´ll be there! Whenever someone spends two hours beng pushed over by the call center trying to cancel their long distance plan and the call connection falls, I´ll be there! Whenever someone gets a computer worm that erases all files after downloading what they thought were naked pictures of Megan Fox using the company computer, I´ll be there!

 

[Panthro]

A fan´s reaction to the prospect of Chris Columbus directing the Superman film reboot.

I'm not digging the idea of Chris Columbus directing Superman either.

 

[Panthro]

SUPERMAN: "This is what I've been reduced to... stripping to make enough cash to fund my reboot. God help me if those stupid heirs win their court case. They don't even care about me the lazy bastards, they just want free money off what their grandfathers concocted. Bastards."

 

[ultimatefan]

ROUTH: Hahaha, Ed Norton is out of The Avengers and Hulk sequels, just like I´m out of the Superman reboot!

LUTHOR: Yes, the important difference being that pretty much all Hulk fans will actually miss Norton.

ROUTH: Go to hell.

 

[Panthro]

ROUTH: Hahaha, Ed Norton is out of The Avengers and Hulk sequels, just like I´m out of the Superman reboot!

LUTHOR: Yes, the important difference being that pretty much all Hulk fans will actually miss Norton.

ROUTH: Go to hell.

Poor Routh. Still:

 

[\S/uperman]

Instead of 3d glasses, moviegoers will get these to watch Tommy on screen as Superman.

 

[Panthro]

SUPERMAN: "Trust me Diana, you look better running around in a metal star spangled bathing suit than whatever that thing is Jim Lee designed for you."
WONDER WOMAN: "Thanks Clark that really makes means a lot to me."

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks Panthro! I felt sorry for Routh even as I wrote, but you know, number one rule of comedy: take no prisoners...

Great stuff, especially the ear plugs one!

 

[ultimatefan]

WELLING: So, how do I look?

ROUTH: Blue is too dark!

WELLING: Jealous a**hole....

 

[ultimatefan]

WELLING: A Believe It or Not Remake?! That was your brilliant comeback?
CAIN: Oh, and Cheaper By The Dozen was your breakthrough role into movie stardom?
WELLING: F*** you.

 

[Panthro]

WELLING: So, how do I look?

ROUTH: Blue is too dark!

WELLING: Jealous a**hole....

 

[Panthro]

WELLING: A Believe It or Not Remake?! That was your brilliant comeback?
CAIN: Oh, and Cheaper By The Dozen was your breakthrough role into movie stardom?
WELLING: F*** you.

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks!