The Amazing Spider-Man The Spider-Man reboot caption thread

[Thebumwhowalks]

....................................

 

[wobbly]

Spidey: "Does my bum look big in this?"

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

"Hi guys, you might wonder what your friendly neighbourhood Spider-man is doing sitting on the outside rooftop of this elevator, instead of being inside with the other passengers...well...lemme tell you...last week I was stuck in an elevator with Iron-man for the better part of a weekend, and the dude did not stop farting, it did things to me, things to my miiiiiiind, now, no-one knows what the hell I'm talking about when I say this, they dismiss it with a knowing smile, well, fug that noise, I'm going to sit on top of this elevator, eating beans and farting all day, farting on as many people as I possibly can, to , y'know, get a little more empathy into the room. So next time if you're in an elevator, and you smell a funny smell, that's probably just your friendly neighbourhood Spidey-man farting his tight little butt off in an attempt to bring humanity together more on the 'fart-damage-understanding' front. and if you have an empty jam jar or such like, you could maybe catch some of my gas and get Stan Lee to sign it, he will inevitably be sticking his face in somewhere, he might even be in your elevator! Look out for him, it's fun to do that you know."

 

[Stelze]

dude, no offence, but I would actually try matching up your 'joke' to the photograph, you could've used one with the Lizard in it like that other poster did, what you did was just completely random and fell flat as a result.

Yeah I know but the pose was so cool. ;_;

 

[Ajendo]

spidey:......uhhhh, it's not what you think.

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

Yeah I know but the pose was so cool. ;_;

ok, sorry, i have a bad skin condition, so maybe was taking offence subconciously and was too hard on you there, also, my teachers at joke school were hard on me, so maybe I have carried that onto you there. anyway, thanks for posting the pic, as it gave me a chance to try one, i can't post pics.

 

[Ajendo]

Thebumwhowalks, have you tried using E45 lotion?

 

[White_Knight191]

http://www.**************.com/images/uploads/spider-man-575.jpg

NYPD: Spider-Man! Freeze!
Spidey: Uh-Oh...

http://www.**************.com/images/users/uploads/10300/Spiderman-2_jpg_e_723d633edd5bb7d527f5b3714f765292.jpg

Driver: Huh?! What the f***?!
Spidey: Hey, what's up? Look, could you give me a ride to 5th Avenue? My webshooters are out and I'm being chased by the NYPD as you probably saw.
Driver: ......

 

[ultimatefan]

SPIDEY: Hey, how about I actually slide my hands and feet on this as, you know, an homage to the Nicholas Hammond show? Okay, okay, it was just a suggestion, gee...

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

Thebumwhowalks, have you tried using E45 lotion?

btw, if anyone is addressing me i do not being reffered to as 'bum', lol, to save you typing out a big string of words.

and no, i am not bothered about that kind of thing, it wouldn't do any good, and my skin looks alright as long as i am healthy, if not as good as it used to(pre-alcohol days), it's more that it flares up when i am sick and/or tired. thanks though Ajendo.

 

[ultimatefan]

SPIDEY Thanks dude. I didn´t think somebody was going to pick me up, you know, looking like this.
DRIVER: Hey, in this city, as long as you don´t carry an axe or chainsaw or ain´t Amy Winehouse, you´re okay.

 

[Hotwire]

Spider-Man: Umm, dude? Is it safe to sleep while driving?

 

[Hotwire]

Spider-Man: This is what's called, "Blendin' in like a ninja!"

 

[Knight Rise]

Lizard: HOW DO YOU FLOAT LIKE THAT?!

Spider-Man: I picked this up when I was watching "Training with Dr. Strange" on my TV. Wanna know what else I learned from TV?

Lizard: I DONT HAVE TIME FO-

Spider-Man: BRUCE LEE KICK! HIYAAAAAAAAAAH!

 

[socool]

Lizard: HOW DO YOU FLOAT LIKE THAT?!

Spider-Man: I picked this up when I was watching "Training with Dr. Strange" on my TV. Wanna know what else I learned from TV?

Lizard: I DONT HAVE TIME FO-

Spider-Man: BRUCE LEE KICK! HIYAAAAAAAAAAH!

Made my day, so far.

 

[Knight Rise]

Spider-Man: Yeesh! Don't tell me you're a hoarder as well!

Lizard: ROAAAAAAAAARRRR!

Spider-Man: I KNEW IT! Don't worry giant iguana man, I'll save you from your own garbage!

Lizard: ENOUGH, YOU ARROGANT WORM!

Spider-Man: What you need is an intervention!

Lizard: LET GO OF ME INSECT!

Spider-Man: WE'RE GONNA GET THROUGH THIS! YOU JUST HAVE TO TRUST ME! Now, which pile do you want to start with?

Lizard: ENOOOOOOOOOOOUGH!

Spider-Man: WE DONT HAVE TIME FOR LEAPFROG!

 

[lukedoggwalker]

spiderman costume is so simple yet they somehow managed to screw that up, why? dont ask me..

 

[Spider-Aziz]

Lizard: HOW DO YOU FLOAT LIKE THAT?!

Spider-Man: I picked this up when I was watching "Training with Dr. Strange" on my TV. Wanna know what else I learned from TV?

Lizard: I DONT HAVE TIME FO-

Spider-Man: BRUCE LEE KICK! HIYAAAAAAAAAAH!

Lizard: ENOOOOOOOOOOOUGH!

Spider-Man: WE DONT HAVE TIME FOR LEAPFROG!

You made me smile wide by just posting these imagest:
Thanks
Love the jokes too

 

[Panthro]

Funny stuff guys.

 

[DACrowe]

Ah....I thought for sure that Gwen would love my costume's happy trail.

 

[spida-man]

Spidey: Hey buddie..can you give me a lift? I think I left my wallet in ym other costume..you know..the one that actually looks good?

 

[ultimatefan]

People are making way too big a deal out of the new costume. The changes are pretty small.

 

[Timstuff]

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

^Yeah, you already posted that in the 'funny pics' thread over in the community section, it's not exactly appropriate here is it? So what is the gag, 'Spider-man is rascist.'?, not v funny, certainly not funny enough to be plastering it in more than one thread.

edit: oh, i just realized, I haven't been to filmschool, so maybe I am missing something that makes the joke funny.

I'll tell you something else man, you have posted some pretty ****ed up pics in the other thread, one at least of which has been taken down, and this one is messed up too. I think you have some disturbing things going on with you man, your perspective on certain events is very skewered and you lack decorum, sometimes it takes one to know one, and I think you should think before posting some images man, but of course, maybe you just don't give a **** and will just post up anything for the wind up.
no surprises that spider-aziz, another poster i would say lacks decorum when it comes to human interaction has given you the thumbs up after i have said this.
As i said, it takes one to know one sometimes, and while i am trying to do something about myself, I guess you guy snever will, as you think you are perfectly normal in some of the things you do.
Perhaps this is why you are scared to drink more than one beer, as you said, you don't go more than one for fear of losing control, perhaps because you don't want people to know some of the ugly things you are keeping inside yourself. It would be damn interesting to read some of the posters minds round here, I'm telling you.

 

[Spider-Aziz]

Spidey: Yo, whassup? It's boring back here without companionship
Driver: As long as you and your lady don't fill my back with fluids it's fine by me that you hitch a ride
Spidey: ....................-__-"

t: