X3: Rewrite-A-Scene

[ntcrawler]

^^^ I think that's really good, especially for filling in the missing links. Good job Ntcrawler, haven't been online for a while with vacation, but hopefully can get this rewrite project going again!

Welcome back Mdizzle! Was wondering where you ran off to. Nice to see you posting here again and chatting up a storm! Thanks for the compliments!

I like these scenes with Scott; even if in the movie he is killed off in the beginning, there still could have been a lot more depth put into his grieving, and even some more altercations with Logan, who thinks "maybe it's time to move on" or watever. Good stuff.

Oh don't worry. I'm sure that dying is definitely not on Cyke's mind. Especially once he sees that he just might have something worth living for or that people really do need him.

 

[ntcrawler]

OK! Time for another scene. This a revised scene between Scott and Logan in the mansion's hallway, taking place at the same time as in the movie.

Purpose of scene: to keep showing that Scott's journey is not due only to faith or voices in his hand, but due to something a bit more... tangible

Changes from movie: physical clues... from Jean? who knows? But Remember the pendant that Jean wore in X2... Because it's gonna be more than just a piece of jewelry.

*** Scene: hallway inside the mansion, main floor. Daytime ***

[Scott walks down the hallway, wearing jeans, a pullover and a leather jacket. He has a small pack slung over one shoulder. He brushes past Logan]

Logan​

Hey, Scott, they were looking for you downstairs, you didn't show

Scott stops and turns around

Scott​

What do you care?

Logan​

Well for starters I had to cover your ass

Scott​

I didn't ask you to

Logan​

No, you didn't. The Professor did. I was just passing through.

Scott​

[hissing]

So pass through, Logan

Scott turns around to leave. Logan grabs his arm and stops him

Logan​

Look... I know how you feel.

Scott:​

The hell you do

Logan​

I know what it's like-

Scott​

Don't

Logan​

When Jean died-

Scott's emotions explode

Scott​

I said Don't! Every damn night I hear her calling out
to me! I relive her terror! Drowning, dying, begging me
to save her!

Logan​

Voices in your head? You've got to get a grip, or you'll go nuts!

Scott​

Then how do you explain THIS?

Scott violently pulls something out of his pocket and shoves it in Logan's face. Logan looks at it. It's the pendant Jean was wearing we saw in X2 during the museum field trip. A silver PHOENIX. Logan looks confused.

Logan​

You wanna tell me what this is?

Scott​

It's the pendant Jean wore for the field trip to the science museum

Logan​

So?

Scott​

So why the hell did I find it on my bed last night?

Logan​

Look...

Scott​

No one could possibly know where she kept it or understand its
sentimental value! Either someone's screwing with my head or...
something's going on"

A silent pause. Logan raises his brow in understanding

Logan​

You're going back there, aren't you?"

Scott​

What's it to you?

Logan​

Scott...What do you hope to find there?

Scott hesitates, then responds

Scott​

Answers

Logan​

There might not be much left. A piece of bone, a scrap of fabric-

Scott​

I'll take my chances

Logan​

Look...I'll stay and help out while you're gone.
But if you find something... I wanna know too

Scott​

Some ONE, not some THING, Logan.

Scott pockets the pendant and walks away

*** END SCENE ***

---

 

[ntcrawler]

I realized that this is no longer just another scene rewrite but has bloomed into a full fanfiction project. So to keep things better organized and on-topic, I set up a specific thread for our X3 rewrite which you can find here:

http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showpost.php?p=9980750&postcount=1

We'll be posting all our scenes, scripts, chapters, illustrations, etc here. This is also the place to help us work out details, discuss ideas, and your chance to provide us with feedback.

See you there, and hope you enjoy!

 

[Mdizzle]

Loved the one you just posted here. Gives a lot more insight into what's going on with Scott, beyond just grief. The pendant thing was significant, too. Alluding to Jean's awakening. Scott is obviously not just bent over backwards over losing Jean...he is haunted by her as well.

I have a scene with pyro again...saved on my computer, keep getting interrupted and lose my train of thought. I'll get it up here in a day or two hopefully, hehe. Good job tho!

 

[Mdizzle]

I realized that this is no longer just another scene rewrite but has bloomed into a full fanfiction project. So to keep things better organized and on-topic, I set up a specific thread for our X3 rewrite which you can find here:

http://www.superherohype.com/forums/showpost.php?p=9980750&postcount=1

We'll be posting all our scenes, scripts, chapters, illustrations, etc here. This is also the place to help us work out details, discuss ideas, and your chance to provide us with feedback.

See you there, and hope you enjoy!

Sweeeeet. I'll deftiniely be there.

 

[LastSunrise1981]

I really love what Ntcrawler did with the dialogue between Scott and Logan. Like a fellow poster said before me, it gives more insight to the grief that Scott is leaving and how he's literally on the verge of insanity.

Well, maybe insanity is the wrong word for it. But he's literally walking in a area of darkness and light.

You know, I had so many ideas for the character of Cyclops in my particular rewrites of certain scenes. I look to the transformation of Wesley Whyndam Pryce(from Angel) in terms of character development.

I'm working on some scenes right now as we speak; I'll post them when they're finished.

 

[Mdizzle]

^^ Would love to read, them, hurry up and get them posted! Heh heh.

 

[LastSunrise1981]

^^ Would love to read, them, hurry up and get them posted! Heh heh.

Patience. They're coming slowly but surely. I'll try to post a couple of them later in the afternoon or evening.

 

[Mdizzle]

hehe yeah I know I'm one to talk. Been working on a scene for dayssss now :P

 

[Mdizzle]

Ok so I've finally gotten a chance to post this scene. The end is kinda shaky, but I wanted so badly to post it, I might just edit it later.


***Scene with the Brotherhood in the woods, Magneto giving his speech***

He contemplated the scene, thirty or so, maybe more. There they were, mutants, and he was there too, out amongst the crowd. To stand and feel, to know, the realization of particular unity and grandeur of coming together…he belonged nowhere else. They stood atop what would serve as their pedestal, exactly where they had placed themselves, hillside sloped and overlooking the surrounding wood ever slightly below. Pyro. He’d left John behind with the rest of them, and now, he knew none of the rejection, the misplaced feelings, the slow burn all while knowing that though mutant, he couldn’t be an X-Man. He was at home now.
“Top honours to the guy who picked this place,” someone said, two feet behind. Madrox. Multiple Man, moniker and chosen tag. “It’s okay, I’ve been meaning to get in touch with nature.”
“Could it be possible for us to assemble so many, and so near to the island?” Her name was Callisto. Tough customer. “We have cover, and the best defense.” She looked back pointedly. “Us.”
“Trees, I dunno. Nature.” Madrox sniffed, acknowledging Arclight and Quills beside him. “Check us out. Magic, the Gathering.”
Pyro smirked, but didn’t look back. He was to the left of Mags, the great Magneto, the true Wizard of Oz. What it felt like to be there, on the verge of something incredible and so profound, he suddenly realized importance, belonging. And now, with Magneto’s speech, honour, honour among thieves.
He was listening, of course, but really just picturing what they looked like standing up there all together. He never thought he’d feel anything near being proud, just being grouped at someone’s side, but there were differences. Useful. Mags cast him a sideways glance mid-speech, Pyro perking instantly, finding himself significant.
He wanted to show off. It wasn’t the time, not yet, and he fought the urge and pocketed the flame. He could hear Mags’ speech floating over the dozens of mutants below, and he remembered what it felt like to be looked down upon. He had grown somehow, because he was not listening so eagerly, so earnestly as before. The words were the slow burn he knew he’d felt, and yet he was standing tall amongst the crowd.
“Brothers.”
Magneto had finished, rousing mutants to cheers and fists waved high.
Behind him, Callisto and Madrox exchanged a glance. And there he was, John no longer, banded together, determined. It was time.

 

[Halcohol]

^Cool. Seems right out of the novel!

 

[Mdizzle]

^^ Thanks! I'm really interested in Pyro...I think they set him up for good things in X2, I wanted to explore his character and his motives more in depth for X3.

 

[ntcrawler]

^^^ Midizzle, that was excellent! I love how you brought out the chars and showed more of what was happening "behind the scenes". THat there was more to the villains than just fighting and combat.

 

[ntcrawler]

My take on Alkali Lake (heh, I made it rhyme). Special thanks to Goddessreicho who helped me put this together and for The Ones for working out and hammering out some of the dialogue!

This scene completes Scott's story arc as well as the pendant's journey. Did Scott Survive? What happened to him? We'll have to wait and see...

---

SCENE - ALKALI LAKE. Daytime

Scott arrives at his destination. As he follows a narrow, tree-lined road, we see the remains of the dam in the distance wedged between mountains and a large expanse of lake in front.

Scott parks his motorcycle at the edgo of a dirt trail and follows the trail through some trees to emergy at the lake along a rocky shore. The rocks are both natural and what's obviously concrete from the remains of the damn.

He stands on the shore for a moment, then walks towards the left following the shore, looking around for signs, clues.

Scott:​

Jean? I'm here, Jean! I've come back for you! Talk to me!"

Scott continues walking along the shore for a while until he gets to a point that's directly across from the damn. An ideal spot to look for any material, debree, or body parts that would have been washed ashore when the dam burst.

Scott pulls out and looks at the phoenix pendant in his hand.

Scott:​

Jean, talk to me, please. What are you trying to tell me?"


There is a rocky outcropping rising about a dozen feet above the water. Scott walks up the outcropping and stands almost at its edge, with an expansive view of the lake.

Scott fumbles the pendant nervously in his hand. Waiting. Searching. He finds nothing.

we hear a voice. "Scott." Then again.

Scott [snapping back]:
Stop it

And again. "Scott!" Louder and louder. It's Jean.

Scott [louder]:
Stop it!

Scott cups the side of his head. We see images flashing. Jean's final moments. She is overwhelmed by a mountain of water. crying out in terror. Screaming. Scott! HELP Me Scott! Help Me! Save me!!! Scott! Scott!

Scott:​

Stop it!!!

Scott clutches his head in both hands, collapsing from the pain. The visions and sounds continue to bombart him in a sea of insanity. Scott! HELP ME! PLEASE HELP ME, SCOTT! SAVE ME! HELP ME! RELEASE ME!!! SCOTT! SCOTT! RELEASE ME! SET ME FREE!!! SCOTTT!!! SCOTT!!!! HELP ME! SAVE ME!!! FREE MEE!!!!!!!

Scott looks up in the air and screams as loud as he can

Scott:​

JEAN!!!!!!!!!

Scott violently pulls his shades off and releases the full potential of his optic blasts directly into Alkali Lake. The beams tear into the water and cut a huge swath, throwing up a massive wave in either direction. His beams travel across the lake until they hit the remains of the dam.

Scott fires until his energy is completely drained. His optic beams fade out and Scott collapses to his knees, eyes closed. Completely, utterly spent. The twin columns of water settle back into the lake and all seems to return to normal. Silent. Tranquil.

A few bubbles gurgle from the center of the lake. Then more and more, until a whirlpool forms in the center.

A pebble floats in the air and brushes past Scott's cheek. Then another. Then a leaf. Then more and morer. Then a leaf. All around him, small and large objects levitate into the air until Scott's area is surrounded by a cloud of floating leaves, rocks, boulders, and twigs.
A violent explosion from the whirlpool as a large, gleaming object shoots out, creating a titanic blast of water in every direction. The shockwave hits the shore and violently throws Scott back away from the edge. He lands painfully on his back.
The object is made of fiery light in the shape of a bird with expansive wings. It blinds Scott, who is shielding his eyes. It slowly flies towards him.
Inside the bird's mass of light we see a dark silhouette of a woman wearing a body-hugging outfit. The object settles down at the edgo of the outcropping.

Scott puts on his glasses and stands up painfully to take up a defensive posture against the object. The fires and light fade out, revealing the woman.

[Camera POV Looking from behind over Scott's shoulder]

We see that the woman is Jean Grey, in her X-men uniform. Her head is down and her face cupped in her hands.Her hair is a much brighter and glossier shade of red and much longer, hanging down in wild waves and reaching down her back.

Scott:​

Jean?

[Cut to Jean's POV]

Jean looks at her hands, then down at her feet. She taps her foot and realizes that it's no longer broken. That pleases her and she smiles. The smile fades and she becomes dazed and confused. Her face is red and swollen, her eyes a little red like someone who hasn't slept for several days. She looks around her, until her eyes focus on someone very familiar just a few feet away from her

[Switch POV between chars]

Jean:​

Scott...

Scott stands there for another long moment, paralyzed. His jaw drops. He cannot believe what he's seeing. He voice becomes hoarse from the shock.

Scott:​

No... It can't be. This can't be real. You can't be real!

Jean slowly shakes her head in amazement.

Jean:​

You came for me...


Scott slowly takes a step towards Jean, then freezes. His hands are visibly trembling, and his legs are unsteady as his entire body shakes

Scott:​

[stuttering]
But... But How? I..s-s-saw you! I s-s-s-saw you d-d-die!

Jean's voice is slow. Distant. Ethereal

Jean:​

It doesn't matter how...


Jean holds her hands out a bit to the side with palms up in an inviting manner.

Jean:​

I'm real and I'm here, for you...

Scott closes the gap, reaches out to Jean and puts his arms around her. To his amazement, she is real and solid and the two move in for the tightest, fiercest, most loving embrace in cinematic history. Jean melts into him, smiling and wraps him in his arms. Scott puts his chin on her shoulder and sobs.

Scott:​

Thought I lost you, Red...thought I lost you forever...

Scott clutches her and holds on like a drowning victim holding onto a life preserver. He squeezes too hard. Jean gasps loudly with a wide-eyed look of alarm. She tries to soothe him by stroking his back with her hands, until Scott relaxes and releases his death-grip to a more comfortable level.

After a long while, they both relax and slowly pull out of the embrace but continue holding each other.

Scott:​

My God... [shakes his head] How is this possible? Jean! What
happened? Are you all right? Are you hurt?

Scott looks over her, checking for any visible injuries. Her uniform is in pristine shape,

Scott:​

Your leg was broken.


Jean shakes her head.

Jean:​

It's not broken. I'm ok.

Scott:​

You've changed. Your hair. It's much longer and the color...

Jean looks down at her hair, absently runs her fingers through it

Jean:​

I feel fine, really. But you...

Jean reaches up and puts her hand on his cheek, then runs her hand across his face, noticing the stubble, signs of what must be bags under his eyes, and his unruly hair.

Jean:​

Scott, you look... [smiles] terrible

Scott:​

It's been...difficult [chokes back], without you

Jean strokes Scott behind his ear in a way that makes him tremble

Jean:​

I told you. I'm here for you


Scott kisses her tenderly on the forehead and they embrace as he buries his face in her hair.

Jean [looks around]:
Where are we?

Scott:​

We're at Alkali Lake. Don't you remember?
You saved us. You saved us all...

Jean:​

I remember... the plane. There was water, a mountain
of water. I was outside. It was coming down on me, and...

Jean gasps and shudders. The objects floating around them shake and rustle as well. Scott looks around with concern, then comforts her by stroking her back

Scott:​

It's ok. You're safe now...

Jean
Then things went... dark. Not awake, not asleep. I
remember calling out to you. And then, I felt you were
close, and the world became clear again. Sensing your strong,
solid mind helped to pull me out of the void

Scott:​

I kept having these visions of you drowning, crying out to
me to save you. I wasn't sure whether that was really you
calling me telepathically or if I was going crazy.
Then a few days ago I found this:

Scott holds out Jean's phoenix pendant in his hand and offers it to her.

Scott:​

Your pendant appeared on my bed one night. I don't know how
it got there, but I thought it was a sign. Something about
it guided me back to this place. Back to you, Jean.


Jean runs her finger over the pendant while lost in thought.

Jean:​

The Phoenix... a mythical bird... it dies in flames to be
reborn from its ashes. It is fire. It is life incarnate.
Now and forever...

Jean's eyes glow with flames as she looks straight at Scott

Scott:​

Jean? Are you all right?

Scott takes a cautious step back. Jean stands there for a second, then looks down, shakes off the feeling, and looks up back at Scott, her eyes normal again

Jean:​

I missed you... I wanted you so much...

Jean leans in, Scott steps in to her, and they take each other fully in their arms again, embracing tenderly. Jean pulls away and looks at Scott intently.

Jean:​

There something I...

Scott:​

What is it?

Jean:​

I always wanted to see your eyes

Scott:​

Jean, I can't. You know what my optic blasts can do

Jean:​

I can control it. My powers are stronger now.

She tries to reach up to his glasses but Scott grabs her wrists with his hands and holds them.

Scott:​

Jean, Don't...

Jean:​

No more hiding. For once I want us to see each other with
nothing in between.

She reaches up and removes his glasses. Scott's eyes are closed and he looks down, uncomfortable and afraid. Jean takes his hands and cups them in her own.

Jean:​

It's ok. Open them. You won't hurt me, and I won't hurt you

Scott:​

I don't want to take that chance.

Jean reaches up and lovingly, tenderly caresses Scott's cheek with the back of her palm.

Jean:​

Scott, Trust me... Don't be afraid. Please... open your eyes

Looking down, Scott slowly opens his eyes. For a moment they flash red, then the red light of his optic beams dims down, as it it's being pushed back into his eyes, until it all but disappears revealing a pair of clear, blue eyes.

Scott looks up and stares in astonishment. He looks around left and right, seeing the world in full color for the first time since he was 15.

Scott:​

Wow....

Scott puts his gaze and full attention back on Jean. He is awed at seeing her in full color for the very first time

Scott:​

How can you do this?

Jean:​

Because you deserve it. I'd do anything for you.

Scott:​

Jean, you're more beautiful than-[chokes up]

Jean smiles a beautiful, disarming smile and giggles softly

Jean:​

My Love, you have beautiful eyes. Eyes as beautiful as your soul

Scott:​

Not as beautiful as your heart...

He runs his left hand gently through her hair, their eyes lock on each other, and they move in for a long kiss. They kiss again, and again, bodies leaning closer into each other until they are touching as much as possible. Scott has both his hands around Jean, and Jean holds the back of his neck gently with one hand. One kiss follows another, tender yet passionate, over and over, smooching and playing, losing themselves in the moment and hoping it never ends.

Jean's eyes open suddenly. The camera POV moves around to face Scott. A moment later Scott's eyes also open wide in alarm. His head moves away from a kiss, wincing from pain.

Scott:​

Jean, something's wrong

Scott lets go, wincing from something painful happening to his face.

Jean:​

It's OK, I can fix it!

Jean tries to put her arms on his in a reassuring gesture. Scott puts his forearm up to shield his eyes.

Scott:​

What are you doing?!

Scott's features are becoming contorted, as if something is squeezing and massaging his face. It's clearly painful. He backs away from Jean

Jean:​

I can control it!

Neither Scott nor Jean notices a large mass of water starting to vaporize into the air around them, going faster and faster as Jean becomes more anxious and agitated.

Scott:​

Jean, stop it!! You're hurting me!

Scott tries to shield his eyes with his forearm. Jean reaches out to him but he backs away from her touch.

Jean:​

​

Scott!

As quickly as they disappeared, Scott's optic blasts come back. Before he can react or look away or close his eyes, they glow intensely and an ocean of red shoots out, enveloping them. Jean screams and instinctly sweeps her hand in front of her in a defensive manner. Scott's beams are deflected and sent straight back towards him. With a scream of his own, Scott is catapulted like a pebble through the air, flying into the trees of the nearby forest.

Jean is knocked off the outcropping by the force of the blast and lands on the rocky shoreline, hitting her head on a stone and passes out.

The vapors quickly spread into a thick fog that settles in around Alkali Lake

[*** END SCENE ***]

And Vilya's illustration of the ending of this scene:

 

[Mdizzle]

^^ Wow. ....So much detail. I really really enjoyed this scene...I'm sure this would have given Scott the justice and the credit he deserves in X3. The dialogue and their interaction is really good too. I like the idea of Jean calling out to Scott, asking for help...reminds me of in the movie where Jean is kind of pleading, but to Logan...seems more appropriate for it to be Scott.

Good job, and thanks for your comments on my scene!

 

[Vilya]

 

[La_She-Beast]

^The pose you gave to Cyclops is really cool Very natural

 

[Vilya]

Thanks i was afraid it was not natural looking.

 

[ntcrawler]

^^^ WOW!!! Vilya!!! You actually drew more to that part??? I HAD NO IDEA!!! I never saw the onee with Jean!!! THAT is an incredible surprise! You just made my day my friend! THANK YOU!

I wrote up the part of the script showing what happened to Scott, but I decided to leave it out. I figured for the story, it might be better to not show what happened to him for a while. Let the other chars wonder about it and worry about him for a bit. Which do you think would work better? Show that Scott survived (if in fact he did) and then show his ordeal after Alkali Lake? Or keep him out of the picture until the point that Ororo gets a phone call that makes her drop the handset and back up against the wall in shock mouthing something incoherent about "He's alive, he's alive..."?

 

[ntcrawler]

This is technically a rewrite. It's the flashback scene which first introduces Jean and how Xavier and Erik first met her. This is the first part which introduces her and shows the nature of the traumatic event that caused her powers to first manifest themselves.

CHANGES FROM MOVIE: The timeframe for starters. We adjusted the timeframe to correctly account for Jean's age. Jean is 36 years old at the start of X3, so she had to be 10 26 years ago, not 20 years ago We're also changing the origin from Kinberg's version to one that's more commonly accepted by the fan community: not of a snooty little girl who liked to hurl her neighbor's cars around and who Xavier smothered in a way that 20 years later came back to haunt him, but of a girl traumatized by a tragic accident that set off her mutation, unleashing her telepathic powers and shaped the rest of her life and that of the X-Men.

[Roll starting credits]

FLASHBACK: 26 Years Ago...


[Scene: DUSK. Residential, suburban neighborhood. Two girls playing frisbee on front yard. One blonde, the other has red hair]


[red-headed woman from across the street, a house with "Grey" on the mailbox calls her daughter from front door]

Elaine:​

Jeannie? Jeannie! Come to dinner!!

Jean:​

ok mom!

Jean throws the frisbee to Annie, who catches it, laughing and enjoying herself.

Annie:​

Hey Jeannie, betcha can't catch this one!

She throws the frisbee off to the side. Jean lunges at it and manages to just cactch in with the tip of her fingers, but falls down on the grass, staining shirt. She enjoys the mess she's making

Elaine:​

Jeannie! Put your shoes on and come to dinner RIGHT NOW!
I'm not gonna repeat myself!

Jean:​

OK, Mom! Just one more throw!

A car is coming around the corner into their street, going much faster than it should.

Jean:​

Hey Annie, let's see you catch THIS one!

Jean throws the frisbee at Annie. Its now dark and Annie misses the frisbee as it flies over her head, into the street. Annie runs after it without looking. The car comes around the corner and heads straight at Annie. A sreech of brakes, but too late. It hits Annie in the side and knocks her back into the yard. Elaine Grey screams at the sight. Annie's mother runs outside and becomes hysterical at what she sees.

Jean:​

ANNIE!!!

Jean screams as she runs towards Annie. Her left ribcage is broken and Annie is covered in blood.

The driver gets out of the car and is yelling, more out of fear than anger when he sees what he did

Elaine:​

Oh my God! What did you do? My God My God! 911!!!

Annie's mother is hysterical and frozen in shock a few steps behind her daughter. She bites her fist and panics, unable to move

Jean:​

Annie?

Jean kneels next to Annie and takes her into her arms. Annie is afraid, but cannot speak because of her injuries. She is having problems breathing.

Jean:​

I got you Annie. No Annie, that man isn't angry. He's
really sorry and afraid

Annie coughs up blood, grabs Jean desperately by her arms, trying to hold on. She tries to say something but cannot speak, which frightens her more. Jean begins to cry

Jean:​

Don't be scared? Please don't be scared!

We hear sirens in the back. Jean looks straight ahead, her eyes distant.

Jean:​

Annie? We're sinking! Where are we? It looks really dark.

The sirens are getting closer

Annie continues to clutch Jean, coughing and panicing. Blood begins to run out of her mouth

Jean:​

Please don't go? You're my best friend Annie! I won't let you go!

Elaine runs out from the house with a cordless phone in hand and across the street

Annie coughs violently on her own blood, panic in her eyes. She spasms, twitches as she suffocates. Jean is crying desperately

Jean:​

Annie! Please don't go! Please don't go Annie! Annie!
Please don't go!!!

Elaine kneels next to Jean and Annie

Elaine:​

Oh my God! hold on Annie! The ambulance is almost here!
Jeannie, turn her head to the side so she doesn't choke!"

Elaine tries to help with Annie and turns her head to the side so she can cough up the blood.

A firetruck and ambulance come around the corner and pull up at the house. Firefighters and paramedics grab their gear and run towards Jean and Annie

Annie stops coughing. Her eyes glaze over and she looks away. She lets go of Jean's arms and her body relaxes. Limp in Jean's arms. She dies.

Jean:​

Annie's gone. It's dark... and warm...I don't want to leave...

With Annie's body in her arms, Jean slumps backwards onto the grass, unconcious

The parademics rush over to Jean and Annie. They pull Annie out of Jean's grasp and try to ressusitate her, working furiously.

Annie's mother sinks to her knees next to them, crying hysterically.

Elaine sees her daughter keel over and panics as well, kneeling by her side and trying to stir her awake.

Elaine:​

Jeannie? Jeannie? Talk to me sweetheart! Jeannie!!
Talk to me please!

Another paramedic kneels down next to Jean and looks for signs of injuries

Paramedic:​

What's wrong with her? She doesn't look injured

Elaine:​

I dunno what's wrong! Just help her please!!!

Camera POV from above shows parademics trying te ressucitate Annie, then moves for a closeup of Elaine crying over an unconcious Jean.

[*** END SCENE ***]

---

Caption: 2 Years Later...

to be continued...

 

[Vilya]

^^^ love this scene! subtle and emotional.

^^^ WOW!!! Vilya!!! You actually drew more to that part??? I HAD NO IDEA!!! I never saw the onee with Jean!!! THAT is an incredible surprise! You just made my day my friend! THANK YOU!

Well i did that jean frame just yesterday and debut here.

I wrote up the part of the script showing what happened to Scott, but I decided to leave it out. I figured for the story, it might be better to not show what happened to him for a while. Let the other chars wonder about it and worry about him for a bit. Which do you think would work better? Show that Scott survived (if in fact he did) and then show his ordeal after Alkali Lake? Or keep him out of the picture until the point that Ororo gets a phone call that makes her drop the handset and back up against the wall in shock mouthing something incoherent about "He's alive, he's alive..."?

I think it would add to the suspence if you dont show what happend to him immediately, but it could also work in a straight forward manner if u show what happend to him and then storm gets the call.

 

[Asteroid-Man]

Okay, here's my shot at Scott in the final battle with Jean. Y'all have already done such a wonderful job I don't think I'm adding anything new. Here it is nevertheless.



Scott and Logan have fought their way to near where Jean is poised – unleashing her powers to back up the fighting Brotherhood members.

Logan
You have to do it. I’ll cover you.

Scott
Now!​

They run towards Jean. Wolverine fights off a few Brotherhood goons as Scott hurries to Jean.

Scott
Jean!​

Jean turns to face Scott. He steps towards her.

Jean
Stay away from me!​

Her powers flare up – she begins to wreak havoc on Scott’s surroundings. He continues to approach her.

Jean[now painfully]
I’ll kill you Scott.​

He’s close to her now.

Scott
No you won’t Jean. Because I know you. You gave your life for us. You love us. You love me.​

Jean is torn. Tears stream down her face. Her powers continue to flare.

Scott
Jean I love you. Now fight it!​

Jean suddenly cuts off her powers. She slouches in grief and pain.

Jean[in tears]
Scott!​

He rushes to her. They embrace. Her eyes suddenly burn with flames – Scott does not see as he holds her. The fire immediately dies out.

Jean

Scott, I –​

Scott
It’s all right Jean.

Jean
No it’s not.​

She pulls away.

Jean
I can’t control it Scott. She’ll be back. [beat] You have to stop me.​

She gently reaches for his visor.

Scott
Jean, no! You don’t have to do this.

Jean
Yes I do. Because I can’t let myself harm anyone again. [beat] I don’t have much time.​

Scott allows her to remove the visor. But his eyes are closed.

Jean
Please Scott!

Scott[tearfully]
I can’t!

Jean
You must! Show me your eyes – one last time.​

His tension eases. She knows he’s about to do it.

Jean
I love you Scott Summers.​

Scott opens his eyes, holding Jean. Briefly, we see his eyes as she does. Then a scream. A flash.

CONT"D

Scott stands back as Jean's unconciouss body floats over the water. All the X-men look up in horror. A cured magneto steps back againts a wall.
Magneto Speaks: Fire,
Jean burts into flames. sparks and ashes fall into the water.

Scott: NO!!!!! I love you!!!

The X-Men quietly move over to scott. Wolverine with tears in his eyes puts his hand on Cyclop's shoulder

Magneto: And incarnate

The water begins to boil and the tide rises.

Strom: Logan,

The X-Men look to the water it bursts up and out comes Jean.

Magneto: Risen from the ashes is a reborn bird...

Magneto slowly backs off screen

Scott: JEAN!

Jean comes down and embraces Scott. They kiss

Scott: You've done it.



FORWARD

Leech: Ms. Monroe!

Leech runs over to her. Angel and Colossus.

Colossus: Hows your dad, Warren?

Angel: He's fine now. He accepts me. Realy, everything is fine.

They look to tv

Beast is shown. Achor man speaks: Dr. Hank McKoy Also known as the beast has stepped down from office to take up the position of Mutant Representative in the UN. Scrolling at the bottem of the screen:
DR. Worthington has terminated continuation of the TEMPORARY mutant cure. Experts say the "Cured" mutants will soon regain there powers aswell as some possible new ones"

Cut to-
Bobby walks in on Rogue crying

Rogue: I should never have taken it!
Iceman hugs Rogue. Rogue sqeezes tightly.

Iceman: Rogue, your chocking me...
Rogue lets go.
Rogue: Sorry
They look at eachother and kiss. Iceman begins to wrinkle.
Rogue: Oh my God! Bobby are you ok?
Iceman: Rogue, you're back!
She hugs bobby even harder then before. A crack is heard
Bobby: Owe!My back, your alot stronger then before!

Kitty walks in without seeing Rogue,
Kitty: Bobby you left your shirt in my room the other nigh- ROGUE!

Rogue looks at bobby angrily
ROgue: Get out!
Bobby: Rogue,

Rogue storms out and walks into a tall Louisian.
Remy: Exscuser moi mademoiselle,
Rogue: Oh sorry
Remy: Are you all right, belle?
Rogue looks at his black and red eyes
Rogue: WHo are you?
Remy: I'm new call me Gambit

Cut to-

Wolverine and Beast

Wolverine: What?
Beast: Mystique aswell. They will be harder to track.
Wolverine: Stronger then before!? How is this posibble?
Beast: Well the MX-gene cells continued to multiply and mutated the other "cured" cells. Not to mention the sample from leech doesn't match with everyones blood type.
Wolverine: So, that wasn't the last Stand we had to take on Magneto


----

Jean: Yes Of course!
scott stands up gives jean the ring and they kiss.

cut to Magneto and Mystique in the underground layer. Magneto is throwing shreds of metal arround and ripping them to molecules while Mystique watchs.
Pyro: The results are done
Mystique: And?
Pyro: If you havnt already notice, You can now alter your DNA.
Mystique smiles.
Magneto: Pyro, go change, the new family will be arriving soon.

----
X-Manssion
Phone rings, Storm picks up, caller ID reads: Moira McTaggert
Storm: Hello?
Pause
Storm: Professor?

DIRECTED BY:
BRETT RATNER

 

[Asteroid-Man]

OK! Time for another scene. This a revised scene between Scott and Logan in the mansion's hallway, taking place at the same time as in the movie.

Purpose of scene: to keep showing that Scott's journey is not due only to faith or voices in his hand, but due to something a bit more... tangible

Changes from movie: physical clues... from Jean? who knows? But Remember the pendant that Jean wore in X2... Because it's gonna be more than just a piece of jewelry.

*** Scene: hallway inside the mansion, main floor. Daytime ***

[Scott walks down the hallway, wearing jeans, a pullover and a leather jacket. He has a small pack slung over one shoulder. He brushes past Logan]

Logan​

Hey, Scott, they were looking for you downstairs, you didn't show

Scott stops and turns around

Scott​

What do you care?

Logan​

Well for starters I had to cover your ass

Scott​

I didn't ask you to

Logan​

No, you didn't. The Professor did. I was just passing through.

Scott​

[hissing]

So pass through, Logan

Scott turns around to leave. Logan grabs his arm and stops him

Logan​

Look... I know how you feel.

Scott:​

The hell you do

Logan​

I know what it's like-

Scott​

Don't

Logan​

When Jean died-

Scott's emotions explode

Scott​

I said Don't! Every damn night I hear her calling out
to me! I relive her terror! Drowning, dying, begging me
to save her!

Logan​

Voices in your head? You've got to get a grip, or you'll go nuts!

Scott​

Then how do you explain THIS?

Scott violently pulls something out of his pocket and shoves it in Logan's face. Logan looks at it. It's the pendant Jean was wearing we saw in X2 during the museum field trip. A silver PHOENIX. Logan looks confused.

Logan​

You wanna tell me what this is?

Scott​

It's the pendant Jean wore for the field trip to the science museum

Logan​

So?

Scott​

So why the hell did I find it on my bed last night?

Logan​

Look...

Scott​

No one could possibly know where she kept it or understand its
sentimental value! Either someone's screwing with my head or...
something's going on"

A silent pause. Logan raises his brow in understanding

Logan​

You're going back there, aren't you?"

Scott​

What's it to you?

Logan​

Scott...What do you hope to find there?

Scott hesitates, then responds

Scott​

Answers

Logan​

There might not be much left. A piece of bone, a scrap of fabric-

Scott​

I'll take my chances

Care if I add something?

Cont'd

Logan: I'm coming with you

Scott: No your not

A voice is heard: Scott,

Scott: Professor?

Prof. X: I tried looking for her like you asked me.

Scott: And?

Prof: Get to Alkali now, Logan I want you and Ororo to go with him

Scott: Professor! I-

Prof: Scott, be prepared, there is something there, but I fear it's not jean.

 

[Asteroid-Man]

I am rewritting he whole film, heres what I got so far

Black. A glowing light is shown in the middle of the screen

Hank McCoy’s voice is heard.

“Mutation,”​

Three streams of light come out of the center light.

“It is an essential key for human survival. Some may fear it, some may hate it. Some my try and cure it. It is usually taken thousands and thousands of years. But every few millennia, evolution leaps forward.”​

The streams of light have turned into a bird. Camera zooms into the middle where a blue flame bursts onto screen. Credits are coming up while cells duplicate and DNA bands are shown while blues flames continue to burn in the background. Pan to…

X3
THE LAST STAND​

An “X” shaped door slams and a circle in the middle spins. Camera zooms into the blue light in its center.

Int. Scene 2

20 years ago​

(Keep this scene cut the angel scene)

INT Scene 3
Black. Explosions and missiles can be heard. Boom. The scene glows. Black. Boom. Glows. Explosion is seen. Wolverine jumps out of the way.

WOLVERINE:
You’re gone a few days and the whole world goes to hell!​

A missile comes by Wolverines head. He ducks and it goes at Iceman and Shadowcat.
Iceman tries to freeze it.

ICEMAN:
It’s not working!

SHADOWCAT:
Let me try.​

Shadowcat grabs Iceman and the missile goes through them.

SHADOWCAT:
Now who’s the damsel in distress?​

Iceman smiles at her. Rogue sees them.

COLOSSUS:
Look out!​

Colossus puts his hand on Rogues check. Rogue metals-up as a piece of rubble comes flying towards them both. It shatters on impact and both are unharmed.

ROGUE:
That felt weird

COLOSSUS:
You're telling me!​

An echoing voice is heard.

XAVIER:
X-Men, keep moving.​

Colossus and Rogue regroup with Iceman and Shadowcat.

SHADOWCAT:
Piotr, where are the others?

COLOSSUS:
Nightcrawler’s getting civilians to safety, Storm’s leaving it obstacles and Cyclops is trying to slow it down.​

Lasers sweep the nearby remains of a house and another missile is launched right passed the X-Men, Nightcrawler then *BANFS* behind them.

NIGHTCRAWLER:
Keep moving! Ve are running out of time!​

The X-Men continue to move.

ICEMAN:
Nightcrawler, you get everyone to safety?

ROGUE:
You think he just decided to abandon his job, unfinished, to come and baby-sit us?

Rogue looks frustrated. Storm comes in.

STORM:
I set up a tornado back there; if Logan fails the tornado should do it. If not then hope for the best.

SHADOWCAT:
What happened to Cyclops?

WOLVERINE:
He couldn’t make it. Watch out Storm, your tornado died out pretty fast. He’s coming and fast.

STORM:
So why aren’t you slowing him down?

WOLVERINE:
Relax me and tinman got this.​

STORM:
Logan we work as a team.

A giant robot lands a half mile away and the earth shakes.

WOLVERINE:
Good luck with that!

Wolverine looks over to Colossus.

WOLVERINE:
Two words, bub. Fastball Special.

Colossus picks up Wolverine, spins around twice and throws Wolverine directly at the Sentinel Robot. Wolverine flies out the other side. Nightcrawler *BAMFS* into the air, catches Wolverine and *BAMFS* back on the ground. The Sentinel falls over.

CEREBRO:
Simulation terminated.

The scene morphs into a large, circular metal room.

WOLVERINE:
Hey Colossus, you throw like a girl.

COLOSSUS:
Cut me some slack Canuck, I pitch with my left!

Wolverine turns left out of the room while the rest of the X-Men turn right. Storm fallows Wolverine.

STORM:
Logan what was that?

WOLVERINE:
A danger room session.

STORM:
A defensive danger room session.

WOLVERINE:
Well the best defense is a good offense. Or is it the other way around?

STORM:
Logan,

WOLVERINE:
Look, if you don’t like it you can punch and scratch Cyclops all you want, I’m just the substitute.

Cyclops walks by the other hall.

WOLVERINE:
Speak of the devil.

Wolverine catches up with Cyclops.

(Sorry I stopped with centering and Bolding halfway but my fingers were hurting with typing

​

and over and over​

 

[Asteroid-Man]

Here's where I will be posting all updates to my script for X3
http://superherohype.com/forums/showthread.php?p=10082578#post10082578