Confession is good for the Hype. - - Part 11

[Erzengel]

When you say vibrant, you're saying it's pretty much a relationship, dating, intimacy, etc.?

 

[jonathancrane]

I always saw it as building up to a relationship: we hadn't checked the boxes on Facebook, but talked to each considerably (even though it would be on a Friday night, the discussions were - the shortest was three hours- and charged: we talked about anything and everything. She was one of the few women I could open to, without hesitation.) And she openly acknowledged enjoying my company several times. We hadn't reached physical intimacy, but were close in other regards (time spent communicating, hanging out, etc.)

 

[Anita18]

I had another attempt at trying to form a relationship fall through: the person I was involved with has stopped talking to me, and I do not know why. This incident parallels the other three pre-relationships I was in: the first two months are vibrant, and then after the third month, communication ceases. It starts with a delay in responses - three days for a text, none for Facebook Private Messages-and then no communication at all. The worst part is, I have no idea what I am doing wrong. I avoid disclosing my political and religious views, in addition to my comic book fandom (it's nearly closeted.) And I avoid emotionally smothering people and try to not overwhelm them with communication (in the case of the last one, she was working on a thesis, so we'd try to talk Friday nights, after she was done with work and returning from a party.
I just wish I knew what I was doing wrong. I can get over my failures, but they do hurt, especially with the woman in question.

I had a number of those when I was online dating. Most stuff just fizzles out, especially if you're mostly communicating online. It's not necessarily anyone's fault. Although IME, a lot of people want more face-time in order to call something a real "relationship." Although if you go too fast, a lot of times they'll get scared off too.

You just need to find the right person. If a girl likes a guy A LOT (and vice versa), nothing short of kicking puppies would dissuade them from dating that person. Just keep trying, and don't put all your eggs in one basket until you ask very specifically if she wants to be in a serious relationship, to avoid getting so hurt every time this happens. I mean yeah, if you're talking a lot, it seems like you're really hitting it off, but maybe all she sees you is a good person to talk to, not necessarily relationship-material. And there's nothing you can do to make a woman more attracted to you. Just gotta move on and try again. Compatibility is a funny thing.

I dated my now-husband very casually over the span of 3 months (like, one date a month sort of thing ) before he finally asked if I wanted to be in a serious relationship. I told him the truth - that most online relationships I'd had just fizzled out, so I was like, "Whatever" and didn't put any stock in it. And he interpreted that as, "Well, I'll just keep asking her out then!" And it worked. All those other times, it didn't work out, but this one time, it did.

 

[jonathancrane]

@Anita18.

Thanks for the advice. I really appreciate it.

 

[sabetoonth]

I confess after the other day when I started feeling bad and got the shakes, etc and figured my blood sugar was low it scared the **** out of me because diabetes runs in the family. And so now when I feel ill or generally funky at all reminiscent of that day I start to freak out a little.

 

[E-Man]

I confess after the other day when I started feeling bad and got the shakes, etc and figured my blood sugar was low it scared the **** out of me because diabetes runs in the family. And so now when I feel ill or generally funky at all reminiscent of that day I start to freak out a little.

 

[ComicChick]

i confess last night was one of the best dreams i had in a while and i kinda wished it was real

 

[sabetoonth]

I eat my damn oatmeal. What about you, huh? huh?

i confess last night was one of the best dreams i had in a while and i kinda wished it was real

Those are both the best and the worst kinds right? Best because they're awesome, worst because they're not real.

 

[E-Man]

I haven't eaten much oatmeal in the past year, but I used to have it as a big part of my diet. It's a great solo meal that lasts a long time. I should bring it back to my diet again.

 

[Spider-Aziz]

I will Papa bear, I will

 

[Victarion]

I confess that I am addicted to the Misc section of the Bodybuilding forums.

 

[Colossal Spoons]

^Don't aware people here, you cheeky k#$^

 

[Anita18]

I confess that I am addicted to the Misc section of the Bodybuilding forums.

They have a section JUST on relationship!

Okay, I have to close the tab, I can't have any more timewasters....

 

[Ultimatehero]

A scene in something I just wrote is just me playing with action figures lol. My adult mind couldn't come up with how the battle would go down, so I started playing with action figures to try to figure it out and managed to get the scene to work. It's all over the place, absurd, and surreal in that it is just as "hmm, that would be cool" as a kid thinks - but, the scene could not have worked any other way. Basically, I 'cheated' lol.

 

[SpideyVille]

I confess that I had to put my dog to sleep tonight. She was doing much better, but she suddenly started screaming out of nowhere and couldn't walk with her hind legs. It was either surgery or death and we just couldn't afford the surgery, not to mention it was a 50/50 chance she'd be back to normal. I'm trying to be strong tonight for my mom's sake, but I'm just so angry because it happened out of nowhere.

 

[Duke]

I confess that I had to put my dog to sleep tonight. She was doing much better, but she suddenly started screaming out of nowhere and couldn't walk with her hind legs. It was either surgery or death and we just couldn't afford the surgery, not to mention it was a 50/50 chance she'd be back to normal. I'm trying to be strong tonight for my mom's sake, but I'm just so angry because it happened out of nowhere.

That sucks man, it's terrible to lose a pet you endear yourself to since it's considered part of the family. I felt sad & angry a few years ago when my pet dog died too & it was very hard to cope with.

 

[Anita18]

I confess that I had to put my dog to sleep tonight. She was doing much better, but she suddenly started screaming out of nowhere and couldn't walk with her hind legs. It was either surgery or death and we just couldn't afford the surgery, not to mention it was a 50/50 chance she'd be back to normal. I'm trying to be strong tonight for my mom's sake, but I'm just so angry because it happened out of nowhere.

I'm so sorry Spidey. It can happen so very fast. My dad was in Taiwan on a business trip for only a week, and their 14-year-old dog got a stroke and couldn't stand up anymore. We put him down 2 days later, when the vet office opened. The vet said it was possible for us to put him in physical therapy, but he was already very old and he probably wouldn't be very happy experiencing it. It was clear he was ready to go.

My dad never got to say goodbye, but my sister and I drove all the way home (for me it was longer - 5 hours at last minute) to support my mom since she was all by herself and we were worried for her.

Before the stroke, it was clear he was getting old, but he was otherwise healthy. It can happen very fast. You did your best. Know that.

 

[Victarion]

I confess that I had to put my dog to sleep tonight. She was doing much better, but she suddenly started screaming out of nowhere and couldn't walk with her hind legs. It was either surgery or death and we just couldn't afford the surgery, not to mention it was a 50/50 chance she'd be back to normal. I'm trying to be strong tonight for my mom's sake, but I'm just so angry because it happened out of nowhere.

I'm sorry to hear this, SV. You did what you could, you took care of her and you were with her to the end. That's what counts.

 

[SpideyVille]

That sucks man, it's terrible to lose a pet you endear yourself to since it's considered part of the family. I felt sad & angry a few years ago when my pet dog died too & it was very hard to cope with.

Yeah, I mentioned this in the Hate thread, but I had another dog die a few years ago, which was the one I grew up with, and it was just so devastating. But this one feels much worse because of the circumstances, and because the dog was really awesome and loving. Ironically, we almost gave her away when we first got her because we didn't want another dog, but I fell in love with her and couldn't let go.

My mom really doesn't want another dog ever again, but I hope to get one when I finally move out, whenever that may be.

I'm so sorry Spidey. It can happen so very fast. My dad was in Taiwan on a business trip for only a week, and their 14-year-old dog got a stroke and couldn't stand up anymore. We put him down 2 days later, when the vet office opened. The vet said it was possible for us to put him in physical therapy, but he was already very old and he probably wouldn't be very happy experiencing it. It was clear he was ready to go.

My dad never got to say goodbye, but my sister and I drove all the way home (for me it was longer - 5 hours at last minute) to support my mom since she was all by herself and we were worried for her.

Before the stroke, it was clear he was getting old, but he was otherwise healthy. It can happen very fast. You did your best. Know that.

Yeah, my dog had to go to the vet 2 weeks ago because of neck pains and we had to give her meds and limit her exercise, which was hard enough. She seemed normal again, but then for some reason she lost all feeling in her back legs and we knew that physical therapy wouldn't have done much and surgery was going to be too expensive so we had no choice.

My only regrets are that we could've done more to prevent this, since she wasn't supposed to be jumping off beds as much as she was in the past, and her weight needed to be monitored better since she was 10lbs overweight. Ironically though, she lost half of that in the past two weeks. It sucks because she was still young and had a lot of years left in her, as opposed to my last dog which had cancer and tumors and eventually went blind.

 

[SpideyVille]

I'm sorry to hear this, SV. You did what you could, you took care of her and you were with her to the end. That's what counts.

Yeah, I was holding her in my arms when they put the needles in her. It was really sad to see her just go limb so quickly. It feels like it was just yesterday that we got her and I spent a week sleeping with her on the floor so she wouldn't feel alone.

I remember reading some list online somewhere about what dogs would say if they could speak, and the last one was about how they never want to be left alone and how being with their owner makes everything easier, even their death.

 

[Anita18]

I remember reading some list online somewhere about what dogs would say if they could speak, and the last one was about how they never want to be left alone and how being with their owner makes everything easier, even their death.

I believe that's the same for people too. That our duty as their loved ones (for pets or for humans) is to remind them that they ARE loved, and to send them away on a cloud of love as they pass on.

I held my guinea pig as she passed from illness, my mom held her dog and my sister and I each took a paw as the needle went in. They both left fairly peacefully, and I felt good that I/we were able to do that for them.

 

[Spider-Aziz]

I confess, I make a duckface when facing the mirror alone

 

[Bruce Banner]

I confess I blacked out and woke up at 4:35 in the morning half naked and have no recollection about what happened and how I got to where I was.

I blame the Russian potato water.

 

[Erzengel]

I hope your ass doesn't hurt.

 

[Jennifer Walters]

I confess that I might've been a BIT of an overdramatic asshat in the past.