The Relationship Thread: Because Superhero Forums are Full of Sexperts! - - - Part 22

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[Erzengel]

Good luck.

 

[the last son]

Thanks.

 

[enterthemadness]

Is it sad or pathetic if I am going to see the new Kevin Hart movie ( a rom-com ) by thyself on Valentine's Day after work?



Be hooooooooonest.

 

[jaymes_e06]

Is it sad or pathetic if I am going to see the new Kevin Hart movie ( a rom-com ) by thyself on Valentine's Day after work?



Be hooooooooonest.

Yes both. Why didn't I get an invitation? You jerk. No wonder you're single.

 

[enterthemadness]

Yes both. Why didn't I get an invitation? You jerk. No wonder you're single.

because I work that night and can only see the 9 ish or 10 ish showing.

 

[the last son]

Had my first meet/date tonight at a bar/ restaurant. I thought it went well. It lasted about. 2 1/2 hrs beforei said i had to end it because of wwork in the morning. It ended in a hug and she said she had a good time and ifi didn't want to go out with her again just ignore her messages. I don't know where i stand on asking the rich, educated woman out for this weekend. The one i told i didn't feel comfortable messaging that much before a meet. She didn't text me today. Anyways as always thanks for the support and advice.

 

[SpideyVille]

So we haven't gotten too far with the actual acting for the scenes in my show, especially since our Director had to drop out because of a health issue and we're still waiting for a replacement, but I finally spoke to my "love interest" about our kissing scene towards the end. We've actually been talking a lot lately in the past week and have been getting to know each other better and she ended up being completely understanding and was actually impressed by how I decided to be up front and tried to talk about this ahead of time.

I told her I respect her relationship with her boyfriend and I wasn't going to try anything that would disrespect that, but at the same time I wanted it to be look and be real because I don't want to half-ass anything for this show. So we decided to go slow and take baby steps so that I would feel comfortable around her slowly as we build up to the point where we actually do kiss at rehearsal. Ironically though, when we were rehearsing just the singing part of the scene, she admitted that she was nervous and even forgot some lines for a second so it was kind of awkward, but not the embarrassing kind of awkward.

 

[BillPardy]

Two weeks ago, I come home from work, I go through the motions I always do. Then my girlfriend walks through the door, and sits down and says, "We need to talk."
We've been together for three and a half years.

We don't ever fight, we agree about nearly everything, we have a planned path for our future, but she said in that moment that she no longer loves me romantically.
She just feels like we're friends that have sex, and thinks we should break up. So I packed my things and left for the night to stay at a buddies, then at 4am she calls me back crying asking me to come home.

We're now trying to work on it. Now giving it some background, she only felt like the romantic feeling has been gone for a month before deciding to call it quits. I think it was a couple days after New Years. And she says there is no reason for it, it just seemed to disappear, which I understand since... Well I couldn't figure out what the hell was going on because it came completely out of the blue.

Last night she gave me an update on her feelings, she said the last two weeks have been great, but the feeling hasn't changed (though she plans on giving it a lot more time), but she also says I need to get a new career, cause she wants me to make more money so I can be more financially like she is, she has a high paying career, where I've been working on a getting a career in a poor paying field for the past 4 years, based on passion for it.

Now I need to find a high paying career, meaning I'll probably need a new degree, and need to focus my attention on doing something I don't want to do, while struggling to do the job I want to be doing on the side. All while racking up more student debt.

Which I'm willing to do cause I don't want to lose her. But my question is, has anyone ever had the "I don't feel like this is a romantic relationship anymore." sprung on them? How did it work out? Did you bring the romance back magically? or did it just not work?

 

[Erzengel]

Had my first meet/date tonight at a bar/ restaurant. I thought it went well. It lasted about. 2 1/2 hrs beforei said i had to end it because of wwork in the morning. It ended in a hug and she said she had a good time and ifi didn't want to go out with her again just ignore her messages. I don't know where i stand on asking the rich, educated woman out for this weekend. The one i told i didn't feel comfortable messaging that much before a meet. She didn't text me today. Anyways as always thanks for the support and advice.

I'd text her tonight and ask if you're still on for tomorrow. If she doesn't respond back, there's your answer. But at least you made an effort.

Two weeks ago, I come home from work, I go through the motions I always do. Then my girlfriend walks through the door, and sits down and says, "We need to talk."
We've been together for three and a half years.

We don't ever fight, we agree about nearly everything, we have a planned path for our future, but she said in that moment that she no longer loves me romantically.
She just feels like we're friends that have sex, and thinks we should break up. So I packed my things and left for the night to stay at a buddies, then at 4am she calls me back crying asking me to come home.

We're now trying to work on it. Now giving it some background, she only felt like the romantic feeling has been gone for a month before deciding to call it quits. I think it was a couple days after New Years. And she says there is no reason for it, it just seemed to disappear, which I understand since... Well I couldn't figure out what the hell was going on because it came completely out of the blue.

Last night she gave me an update on her feelings, she said the last two weeks have been great, but the feeling hasn't changed (though she plans on giving it a lot more time), but she also says I need to get a new career, cause she wants me to make more money so I can be more financially like she is, she has a high paying career, where I've been working on a getting a career in a poor paying field for the past 4 years, based on passion for it.

Now I need to find a high paying career, meaning I'll probably need a new degree, and need to focus my attention on doing something I don't want to do, while struggling to do the job I want to be doing on the side. All while racking up more student debt.

Which I'm willing to do cause I don't want to lose her. But my question is, has anyone ever had the "I don't feel like this is a romantic relationship anymore." sprung on them? How did it work out? Did you bring the romance back magically? or did it just not work?

Comfortableness, routine and taking things for granted are common occurrences when you've been with people who've been dating for a while.

I think you need to really take an introspective into yourself and your relationship. Do you think you take her for granted? Are you more like friends instead of significant others? Is there a fair amount of intimacy, not just sex.

Next, you need to talk to her and ask what she wants and what her expectations are. Then, is this something you both want to work on. Maybe you should have date nights. Or do more things together. Be spontaneous.

In terms of the job. Thats a different subject entirely. If you did start for a new career you could still be years away from being at a point where she is now. She has to understand that. Also, having a career you are not necessarily passionate about may also put a tax on your relationship especially giving up on a career which you do have one for. I hope you don't end up regretting it and even become resentful. On her end though, I think some people would think she's being unfair about the financial aspects of it but there's nothing wrong with someone having financial stability.

I would however, make sure if the financial aspect is not the real issue and she's using the lack of romance as an excuse.

You two have to work things out and put all your cards on the table. Communication.

 

[the last son]

Sent the woman i went out with last night a message,explaining i had a good time and would like to take her out again. She said she did as well and of course i could. I said, great hopefully we could get closer next time. Her response was, well I'm excited to see you again. Not a yes or no on getting closer. I hope because i didn't go for a kiss, she sees us as friends. I guess we'll find out.

 

[Erzengel]

Sent the woman i went out with last night a message,explaining i had a good time and would like to take her out again. She said she did as well and of course i could. I said, great hopefully we could get closer next time. Her response was, well I'm excited to see you again. Not a yes or no on getting closer. I hope because i didn't go for a kiss, she sees us as friends. I guess we'll find out.

Was there any physical contact? Her hand on your arm, touching in general?

 

[Darthphere]

Sounds like you want sex. Like, why would you say that. You might as well have sent her a text saying "So yeah we ****ing next time?"

 

[the last son]

Not at all. She kicked me a few times at the dinner table and touched my arm once to see my tattoo. I sent her a message just now,telling her how amazing she looked. She replied thanks you're so handsome. How do i play this?

 

[Erzengel]

In terms of what? Flirting?

 

[the last son]

Getting close and letting her know, i want more than friendship.

 

[Erzengel]

Well, are you looking to get closer to her just physically or you just don't want this to fall into the friend zone?

If it's the former, if you're connecting, and you're having a really good time on your next date. When it's appropriate, lean in and go for it. Obviously, not in the middle of walking, etc.

 

[Hobgoblin]

The woman that I had that terrible date with last month contacted me via the dating website today. (I had made my account invisible and made it visible recently.) She said that I owe her "a serious apology." I blocked her. Seriously, she still thinks I owe her something?

Wow.

 

[SpideyVille]

Not at all. She kicked me a few times at the dinner table and touched my arm once to see my tattoo. I sent her a message just now,telling her how amazing she looked. She replied thanks you're so handsome. How do i play this?

As one of my favorite Hypsters who I haven't seen around here much lately once said: Send dick pics.

 

[Hyde]

The woman that I had that terrible date with last month contacted me via the dating website today. (I had made my account invisible and made it visible recently.) She said that I owe her "a serious apology." I blocked her. Seriously, she still thinks I owe her something?

Wow.

Good Lord...

 

[Enriquespy]

Hide yo wife! Hide yo kids!!

 

[amazingfantasy15]

Sent the woman i went out with last night a message,explaining i had a good time and would like to take her out again. She said she did as well and of course i could. I said, great hopefully we could get closer next time. Her response was, well I'm excited to see you again. Not a yes or no on getting closer. I hope because i didn't go for a kiss, she sees us as friends. I guess we'll find out.

The whole point of more dates is to get closer, I really don't think you need to say that.

Not at all. She kicked me a few times at the dinner table and touched my arm once to see my tattoo. I sent her a message just now,telling her how amazing she looked. She replied thanks you're so handsome. How do i play this?

Sounds like flirty touching to me which is great and what you want.

Getting close and letting her know, i want more than friendship.

When the moment feels right on your next date, kiss her. That sends a pretty straight forward message.

 

[Warhammer]

The woman that I had that terrible date with last month contacted me via the dating website today. (I had made my account invisible and made it visible recently.) She said that I owe her "a serious apology." I blocked her. Seriously, she still thinks I owe her something?

Wow.

She will find you and she will kill you.

 

[Hobgoblin]

Never again will I date a woman that tells me up front that she possesses a certain set of skills.