Raiders of the Official Relationship Thread

[Thebumwhowalks]

I went to this art exhibit back when i was a student, and what it was, was all these copies of real suicide notes, the artist had got access to some police files somehow, and there was one, and all it said was 'Sometimes having a big dick is more trouble than it's worth.'

 

[Erzengel]

I was talking to me best friend the other day and she warned me never to be honest with a guy about how many men you've slept with, because in her experience it ALWAYS freaks them out. Whether it's majorly less than them, or majorly more than them.

Thoughts?

Don't bring it up?

I think honesty is very important in a relationship. I also believe that you are the sum of your experiences good and bad and if someone truly gets you they have to accept everything about you.

However, that time in college when you banged 2 guys at the same time OR the time you your buddy when to Tijuana and made out with those twins and their cousin, eh, I'd leave that stuff out.

BUT, also know to get yourself tested.

And knowing is half the battle.

 

[Anita18]

Eh? Not sure what your experience is, but I'd say it seems ro be enjoyable for most. Just like an average unit you have to know how to use it. Although there's nothing I do that someone with a smaller one couldn't do. Like you say it can be painful.

My bf I think is pretty average (maybe a little larger than average according to Wikipedia) and frankly quite enough!

I think porn has really skewed people's perceptions of what's normal in terms of female AND male bodies, and what each prefers.

Actually, while we are on the subject of sex -

I was talking to me best friend the other day and she warned me never to be honest with a guy about how many men you've slept with, because in her experience it ALWAYS freaks them out. Whether it's majorly less than them, or majorly more than them.

Thoughts?

I was a virgin when I met my bf. I figured I'd tell him, so we could go into it slowly instead of him just ramming it into me when I'm really quite unprepared, as you say.

That's the only time where it's important, I think. I'm not sure how many women my bf has slept with before me, and I didn't really care as long as he disclosed any STDs.

I went to this art exhibit back when i was a student, and what it was, was all these copies of real suicide notes, the artist had got access to some police files somehow, and there was one, and all it said was 'Sometimes having a big dick is more trouble than it's worth.'

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

My bf I think is pretty average (maybe a little larger than average according to Wikipedia) and frankly quite enough!

I think porn has really skewed people's perceptions of what's normal in terms of female AND male bodies, and what each prefers.

Pornos are fantasies, no different from any other. They'll take an average guy, a fish lense camera, pumps, the most petite girl ever and tell you he has a 10 inch python when really its a bunch of nonsense and camera tricks. There really aren't that many hung people out there and they don't all do porn. As you mentioned to, what is 'normal' does not matter in the world of porn. Part of the fantasy is making the abnormal seem common or expected. Vajayjays are small typically, and weren't meant to take some of the outrageous sizes depicted in porn.

 

[amazingfantasy15]

"You are such a nice man"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWaLxFIVX1s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umDr0...eature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgI2ZQVyrBo&feature=related

I don't like when girls I'm interested in say that. I don't like that at all. That basically makes me think "Ok so what she's really saying is "You're such a nice man but I would never date you. You're so nice!!"

Noooooooooooooooo

You're not a nice guy though because you waited to tell her how you feel. You probably danced around the issue of actually asked her on a date and made it sound like friends hanging out. You don't need to be a jerk, you just need to be direct, make your intentions known. Don't hang out, go out, make a move, it doesn't need to be a big move, just something small. Cross that touching barrier, let go of your inhibitions and just trust your instincts.

I was talking to me best friend the other day and she warned me never to be honest with a guy about how many men you've slept with, because in her experience it ALWAYS freaks them out. Whether it's majorly less than them, or majorly more than them.

Thoughts?

I actually don't care how many other guys my girlfriend has been with. She's with me now that's all that matters. In my mind, if a guy cares about the number of guys before him, there's a problem and he's probably very insecure in himself.

 

[Hound55]

Eh? Not sure what your experience is, but I'd say it seems ro be enjoyable for most. Just like an average unit you have to know how to use it. Although there's nothing I do that someone with a smaller one couldn't do. Like you say it can be painful.

It's annoying when you're just doing something mundane, like the dishes, crack a hard-on for some reason and wake up 4 hours later sprawled on the floor once the blood has returned to your brain...

 

[Anita18]

I actually don't care how many other guys my girlfriend has been with. She's with me now that's all that matters. In my mind, if a guy cares about the number of guys before him, there's a problem and he's probably very insecure in himself.

There was a thread I was reading on another forum (for introverts) that basically asked whether it was wrong to feel uncomfortable that his fiancee kept photos of her exes. I asked whether it was a "conquest wall" (I thought that was a pretty good term ) or whether it was in an album. It was in an album.

A bunch of people replied and said basically they would tell her to get rid of them and I'm all, "WTF is wrong with you people? They're in an album sitting in a shelf somewhere, they're not in his face 24/7!"

Granted, he's been asking other advice about this particular girl ("she always makes me look like I'm in the wrong!" was pretty gold) and the future of this relationship frankly does not look good.

 

[Erzengel]

I know this woman who made her husband move because the house they lived in, he once shared with another woman and the house had "memories".

 

[Hound55]

I know this woman who made her husband move because the house they lived in, he once shared with another woman and the house had "memories".

If it has memories, then it's a sentient being.

And she just wants to up and abandon it? Disgusting.

One step up from Prom Night Dumpster Baby mommas...

 

[Erzengel]

Just so you know, if you ever come to my house. Anywhere you sat, yeah, we probably got down there.

 

[Hound55]

I just assume that everywhere I go...

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I actually don't care how many other guys my girlfriend has been with. She's with me now that's all that matters. In my mind, if a guy cares about the number of guys before him, there's a problem and he's probably very insecure in himself.

I disagree completely. There are a lot of reasons to care that in my mind have a lot to do with them and not me. First is the obvious risk of STDs which are not necessarily something you'll catch right away. Second is trust. That's not something I can put a number on but past a certain point you have to wonder how likely it is they'll cheat down the road.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I must admit, I don't think i've ever had a guy who had a small penis, so I honestly can't comment... then again, i've slept with a few people who probably think they have a small penis but I failed to notice, so who knows!

Size really doesn't matter to me is all I know.

In fact, i've been with a guy once who had a pretty big one, but very much did not seem to realise that or take that into account in how enthusiastic he was (if you know what I mean)... and that's just not fun if your body isn't ready for it (if you know what I mean)...

The phrase I always use is "You really can't just stick it in there". I live for the reaction though...."oh my!"

Actually, while we are on the subject of sex -

I was talking to me best friend the other day and she warned me never to be honest with a guy about how many men you've slept with, because in her experience it ALWAYS freaks them out. Whether it's majorly less than them, or majorly more than them.

Thoughts?

First rule: Guys, don't ask questions you don't really want to know the answer to.

Second rule: While honesty is key, there are ways of being honest without revealing too much.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I just assume that everywhere I go...

I bet if you shined a black light in the White House the place would light up like a Christmas tree.

 

[amazingfantasy15]

I disagree completely. There are a lot of reasons to care that in my mind have a lot to do with them and not me. First is the obvious risk of STDs which are not necessarily something you'll catch right away. Second is trust. That's not something I can put a number on but past a certain point you have to wonder how likely it is they'll cheat down the road.

Well yeah, this is important and it's something I'd want to know whether she has an STD or not, but I don't need a number for that.

As for trust thing, a girl could've only been with one person before you and still cheat.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

Well yeah, this is important and it's something I'd want to know whether she has an STD or not, but I don't need a number for that.

As for trust thing, a girl could've only been with one person before you and still cheat.

True, but I'm also not naive about past behavior influencing future behavior.

 

[LOBO3315a]

And a girl could have caught an STD on her first time with someone.

If you want to know a number, then you are insecure. Just assume she's been monkey in the middle on several occasions, and learn to live with it. Because she's really not going to tell you.

Heck, I didn't know my X-wife was as promiscuous when we were dating as she was until after the divorce. She was getting banged by a guy when I called her from Germany one time.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

I disagree completely. There are a lot of reasons to care that in my mind have a lot to do with them and not me. First is the obvious risk of STDs which are not necessarily something you'll catch right away. Second is trust. That's not something I can put a number on but past a certain point you have to wonder how likely it is they'll cheat down the road.

Past what point though? What number would be too much?

Double figures? Past 50? Over 100?

I mean, I think it's true the other way around as well, don't get me wrong. I'm sure i'd be pretty uncomfortable if I found out a guy had slept with over a hundred women, or even 50, before me... because it suggests he's a 'player'.

I'm just wondering where other people would draw the line, if at all.

As for the STD thing... i'd hope that if you've gotten far enough into the relationship to start asking each other about your past sex lives (which I personally can't see happening early on), then you've already dealt with issues like 'Do you have an STD?'

The phrase I always use is "You really can't just stick it in there". I live for the reaction though...."oh my!"

First rule: Guys, don't ask questions you don't really want to know the answer to.

Second rule: While honesty is key, there are ways of being honest without revealing too much.

How can you be honest without revealing too much if someone outright asks you what your magic number is?

Personally, I think you just have to be dishonest.

I feel 6 is a good enough number to make a guy feel comfortable. He can't freak out that you haven't have many guys and might want to try more people somewhere down the line, and he can't freak out that you've slept with too many people either.

Although I suppose that all depends on the guys number as well.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

Past what point though? What number would be too much?

Double figures? Past 50? Over 100?

I mean, I think it's true the other way around as well, don't get me wrong. I'm sure i'd be pretty uncomfortable if I found out a guy had slept with over a hundred women, or even 50, before me... because it suggests he's a 'player'.

I'm just wondering where other people would draw the line, if at all.

As for the STD thing... i'd hope that if you've gotten far enough into the relationship to start asking each other about your past sex lives (which I personally can't see happening early on), then you've already dealt with issues like 'Do you have an STD?'

First, I mean people do lie. Sometimes its good to lie, but obviously it isn't good to lie about STDs, yet people do it a lot. Some people live in complete denial of them. It's frustrating that this happens, but yeah, you really only think you know things about people. There's a faith there that's not necessarily reality.

One way to know is if things don't line up. If someone says they're clean and maybe you find out they're promiscuous and maybe you know things about these people from her past. There's paranoia but there's also being skeptical. With relationships I'm usually the one who is 'hard to get'. I mean even though I am very forward about sex at times, I'm really quite particular about which girls I like. I don't have a laundry list of what I like but certainly things make me lean one way or another. I like girls in the middle. Little bit of many things, but not too much of one (sexually)

How can you be honest without revealing too much if someone outright asks you what your magic number is?

Personally, I think you just have to be dishonest.

I feel 6 is a good enough number to make a guy feel comfortable. He can't freak out that you haven't have many guys and might want to try more people somewhere down the line, and he can't freak out that you've slept with too many people either.

Although I suppose that all depends on the guys number as well.

I think 6 does sound "right"-ish I guess haha

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

It's funny how you can love someone, and they have always taken the high ground with you, always pointing out your mistakes, and you take it all, you love them, you know they are right a lot of the time...but then...they do something so hypocritical, that completely undermines every time they have accused you of something, and suddenly you start to lose respect for this person, you start to realize that all these past months, all the times you have been taking it, ...that they were just a frickin hypocrite, just another holier than thou bs-er, and you just feel like...who is this person, who the hell do they think they are to have been going on at me for apparently cheating(when I wasn't), and then they go and cheat behind your back by accepting a romantic gift from a guy they know fancies her.
Fug that noise, I am better than that person, *that* is the sign of a sure fire cheater in the future.
Masterbating over another woman when you are going through some problems and think you are getting dumped anyway, is *not* cheating.
all this frickin time i have been hearing this, that and the next thing about how this and that indiactes that you will cheat in the future, that you will leave me in the future, and then she goes and doe ssomething like that, that is a far worse indication of a bs-ing cheater.
go for it, run to him, go and **** his brains out, just don't ever expect to be my friend, I'm not bitter, i just don't hang out with cheating hypocrites.

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

Go **** him, go and **** him and be a pair of little bs-y hypocrites together, wrapped up in bs for the rest of your bs lives together. I have my honour, you don't.

 

[terry78]

If it's at the point where she can fit a B-52 in there, then it may have been a few too many.

 

[Erzengel]

It's funny how you can love someone, and they have always taken the high ground with you, always pointing out your mistakes, and you take it all, you love them, you know they are right a lot of the time...but then...they do something so hypocritical, that completely undermines every time they have accused you of something, and suddenly you start to lose respect for this person, you start to realize that all these past months, all the times you have been taking it, ...that they were just a frickin hypocrite, just another holier than thou bs-er, and you just feel like...who is this person, who the hell do they think they are to have been going on at me for apparently cheating(when I wasn't), and then they go and cheat behind your back by accepting a romantic gift from a guy they know fancies her.
Fug that noise, I am better than that person, *that* is the sign of a sure fire cheater in the future.
Masterbating over another woman when you are going through some problems and think you are getting dumped anyway, is *not* cheating.
all this frickin time i have been hearing this, that and the next thing about how this and that indiactes that you will cheat in the future, that you will leave me in the future, and then she goes and doe ssomething like that, that is a far worse indication of a bs-ing cheater.
go for it, run to him, go and **** his brains out, just don't ever expect to be my friend, I'm not bitter, i just don't hang out with cheating hypocrites.

So....she caught you masterbating.....

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

I really want my so-called-'giurlfriend' to go jump in a plane and go bang this guy who gave her a watch. Hurry up, do it, blow every chance you have of being with me, or give back the ****ing watch, which you should not have accepted in the first place. that is a personal gift of the romantic kind, and you know he has feeling s for you, so you cheated, you cheated in real life, and if you don't wanna give back the watch, then you would be as well to go all the way and just **** his brains out, but just do not think you are ever gonna be any kind of part of my life, if i pass you in a corridor, i am not gonna acknowledge you. that's what happens when you cheat for real, you spoil everything that came before, and love turns to hate. espo when i have been the one who has been accused of being the type who would cheat on you in the future, or leave you for someone else...

so, on you go, knock yourself out and go talk the same old crap with him every day like a pair of robots with your convos being the exact same ones you have on these boards all the time. have fun with that one, you can both sit and talk a lot of hypocritical bs with each other about other people all day and feel superior. like you are both smarter than everyone else, which is also a lot of bs.
and i bet both of your attempts at creative writing stink.
so you can both sit in each others arms and take consolation that no-one likes either of your bs attempts at fiction as well.
go and hurry up and get that started already.

 

[Thebumwhowalks]

So....she caught you masterbating.....

aye, well, apparently in bizarro world masterbating while thinking of another woman, is a sure sign that you will one day be a cheater, or leave her for another woman, and i only ever did that a couple of time over the last 10 months, and haven't done so for many months...
..but, her accepting a personal gift from aguy who fanbcies her and is courting her by doing so, that she would wear on her ****ing wrist all the time, so it's a romantic gift, jewellery...is alright?!
****ing absolute hypocrite, the amount of sh** i have taken for 'crimes of the future' i may or may not commit, and she actually goes and commits emotional adultery.
Anyway, I'm beginning to think they both deserve each other, I knew he was full of it, but now i see they are both full of it to a large degree, he always accuses me of being someone who would cheat in the future, or will leave her...when I am as sure as a person can be, that would not be the case..

...and now it turns out, she is the one who would probably cheat, because, that is what she just did.
I'm really disapointed, i honestly thought she was special, some kind of cut above all the usual hypocritical bs that people do all the time, but now, man, she is a massive bs artist in my eyes...just unbelieveable.