The Dark Knight The Dark Knight Caption Thread II

[ultimatefan]

Thanks Panthro! Great stuff all around, especially the narration thing.

 

[ultimatefan]

NOLAN: Okay, read that contract clause for me.
BALE: "In the eventuality of Christian Bale losing his temper and firing away insults and profanities on set for frivolous reasons, such as a co-worker making an honest mistake, he´ll lose all contractual payments for the next Batman movie and all potential future ones, as well as be obliged to a public apology, preferrably including real tears, plus three months of community service and anger management therapy, and subject himself to further public humiliation by appearing in all parodies of his inappropriate behavior in all available medias."
NOLAN: Perfect.

 

[ultimatefan]

BATMAN: See, THIS is what happens when the crew can´t make up their minds about using lenses or mask holes!

 

[Panthro]

BATMAN: See, THIS is what happens when the crew can´t make up their minds about using lenses or mask holes!

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks!

SUPERMAN: So Bruce, if someone you deeply loved has spent the last few years as a lifeless vegetable, with no chance of recovery, would you pull the plug on that person as an act of mercy?
BATMAN: You mean, like if Fox finally cancelled The Simpsons?
SUPERMAN: Exactly.

 

[kedrell]

Batman: "I want to believe in you, Clark. I really do. But you've let me down before."
Superman: "Please, how can I make you trust me?"
Batman: "I remember the first time we met. You were a simple hayseed hero afraid to get in my Batmobile because you thought I wanted you to perform oral sex on me. Do you remember that?"
Superman: "Yeah."
Batman: "And now the tables are turned and I don't know if I can trust you."
Superman: "Just...give me a chance."
Batman: "Alright I'll trust you......but only if you will perform oral sex on me."
Superman[pauses]: "What?"
Batman: "Right here. Right now."
Superman: "You can't be serious."
Batman: "Oh, I am serious. Look..."

Batman: "....this is my serious face."

 

[ultimatefan]

Love the Team America reference!

 

[Panthro]

Thanks!

SUPERMAN: So Bruce, if someone you deeply loved has spent the last few years as a lifeless vegetable, with no chance of recovery, would you pull the plug on that person as an act of mercy?
BATMAN: You mean, like if Fox finally cancelled The Simpsons?
SUPERMAN: Exactly.

Yours was funny too ked

 

[kedrell]

Thanks guys.

 

[ultimatefan]

NOLAN: No, that´s not Megan Fox naked, it´s a fake. Notice how the body has a more olive skin than the face.
BALE: Damn you´re right.
NOLAN: Also, I don´t think she´d do such an unspeakable thing to that poor horse.
BALE: Hmmm yeah, they should have used Amy Winehouse instead....

 

[Panthro]

NOLAN: No, that´s not Megan Fox naked, it´s a fake. Notice how the body has a more olive skin than the face.
BALE: Damn you´re right.
NOLAN: Also, I don´t think she´d do such an unspeakable thing to that poor horse.
BALE: Hmmm yeah, they should have used Amy Winehouse instead....

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks!

LOHAN: Oh no, Ricky Martin is gay!!

BRUCE: Oh, so I guess there WAS a person in this world who didn´t know that yet...

 

[Panthro]

Thanks!

LOHAN: Oh no, Ricky Martin is gay!!

BRUCE: Oh, so I guess there WAS a person in this world who didn´t know that yet...

 

[Amber]

damn, i need glasses

 

[Panthro]

Hehehe, glasses.

BATMAN: "What the Hell? Superman just flew by and gave me the finger! That bastard!"

 

[ultimatefan]

Thanks Panthro! Cool one, Amber!

SUPERMAN: Please, Bruce, ´people say that, if you watch this video, you´ll die!
BATMAN: C´mon, Clark, that´s irrational and stupid.

SUPERMAN: I warned him!!

 

[Panthro]

Thanks Panthro! Cool one, Amber!

SUPERMAN: Please, Bruce, ´people say that, if you watch this video, you´ll die!
BATMAN: C´mon, Clark, that´s irrational and stupid.

SUPERMAN: I warned him!!

 

[kedrell]

Superman: "So what do you think about Megan Fox playing Red Sonja?"

Superman: "Yeah, I agree."

 

[Panthro]

Superman: "So what do you think about Megan Fox playing Red Sonja?"

Superman: "Yeah, I agree."

Bwahahahahahaha

Not do deny the attractiveness of Megan Fox but yeah, Red Sonja she is not.

 

[Panthro]

ultimatefan, allow me to expand on this -

COMIC BOOK GUY: Meh, The Dark Knight is overrated, didn´t really have that much more impact than other blockbusters, deserved not to get other major Oscar nominations like Avatar did...

HARVEY DENT: "Shaddap you! You're either another pretentious film snob who can't stand seeing a well made tent pole film succeed while a bunch of no talent nobody director wannabes languish making cheap no budget independent films that even a 3 year old would dismiss as less than artistic garbage starring either has beens or never will bes, or you're a pretentious Marvel fan who can't stand it that Dark Knight ultimately out performed the equally good albeit good in a different way Iron Man, which still made a damn good bit of money, more than any would have expected for a so called 2nd tier B-list non-Spider-Man/non-X-Men/non-Wolverine character! Or you're an angry Superman fan who can't stand it that once again Batman struck a gold mine at the box office while Superman continues to languish in development Hell after his not so triumphant 'return' failed to get the franchise up and running again! So do us all a favor and f*** off you f***!"

 

[Panthro]

JOKER: "Yo! Where the Perma-White Women At?"

 

[Panthro]

BATMAN: "I'm a little tea pot short and stout! This is my handle and this is my spout!"

 

[ultimatefan]

THanks and hehehehehe

KEATON BATMAN: I´ll finally get my revenge on you!!

NICHOLSON JOKER: Oh c´mon, I killed your parents like a million years ago...

KB: I don´t mean you, I´m talking to YOU, *****ebag!!

DEPP: Me? What did I ever do to you?

KB: What did you do?! YOU RUINED MY F***ING CAREER, THAT´S WHAT YOU DID!! If it weren´t for you, I could have been Tim Burton´s go-to guy!! I could have been Edward Scissorhands, Willy Wonka, Sweeney Todd, The Mad Hatter!! Do you know I played a talking snowman?! A F***ING TALKING SNOWMAN!! I can´t even get Tim to make a Beetlejuice sequel, and he´ll probably cast you anyway!!

DEPP: Huh, well, look on the bright side... Helena Bonhan-Carter got all that too, but she actually has to sleep with Tim...

KB (shudders): Okay okay, I´ll give you that... You know, suddenly the talking snowman doesn´t sound so bad, it was kind of a sweet family movie...

 

[Panthro]

THanks and hehehehehe

KEATON BATMAN: I´ll finally get my revenge on you!!

NICHOLSON JOKER: Oh c´mon, I killed your parents like a million years ago...

KB: I don´t mean you, I´m talking to YOU, *****ebag!!

DEPP: Me? What did I ever do to you?

KB: What did you do?! YOU RUINED MY F***ING CAREER, THAT´S WHAT YOU DID!! If it weren´t for you, I could have been Tim Burton´s go-to guy!! I could have been Edward Scissorhands, Willy Wonka, Sweeney Todd, The Mad Hatter!! Do you know I played a talking snowman?! A F***ING TALKING SNOWMAN!! I can´t even get Tim to make a Beetlejuice sequel, and he´ll probably cast you anyway!!

DEPP: Huh, well, look on the bright side... Helena Bonhan-Carter got all that too, but she actually has to sleep with Tim...

KB (shudders): Okay okay, I´ll give you that... You know, suddenly the talking snowman doesn´t sound so bad, it was kind of a sweet family movie...

 

[ultimatefan]

NOLAN: It´s true, by current tracking Iron Man 2 may break our box office record!
BALE: Hmmm, it means for the sequel we may have to use our secret weapon...

CATWOMAN: Like these, don´t ya? Now picture them in 3-D...