Raiders of the Official Relationship Thread

[SpideyVille]

No I really mean it. Like I've hit it off with girls online before, but in person, we were both like different people and it didn't feel the same. That's why its always been a bigger priority to me to talk to a girl face to face first before anything if I like her. Like I wouldn't ask a girl out online or via text. Granted, I have not been very open or outgoing in the past, but that's something I'm working on changing, especially now that I feel much better about myself.

But I will say this, if things don't work out this year, meaning I don't change and don't even meet or talk to any girls at all, then I will give online dating a chance. But for the time being, I haven't lost hope that things will turn out the way I hope.

 

[Anita18]

See that's the thing that makes me very reluctant to try a dating site. Not that I think it doesn't work or isn't helpful, but for me personally I'd feel pressured to like someone who was 100% match for me. Like I fell in love with my friend's friend before I met her just because she seemed to be a good match for me. But obviously the chemistry wasn't there because I was not comfortable with being set up or matched with someone. I think that's the biggest thing that has kept me from trying one of those sites out. I still want to believe that I'll meet some girl the old fashioned way because that's romantic to me.

That's what I thought too, until I determined that I was just too weird and maybe if I met 100 new people a month I'd find someone. But I'm a hermit - I'm lucky if I meet 5 new people a month, and I'm shy so I don't put myself out there and show off how awesome I am anyway. The people you'd meet walking around are probably not shy and probably not fellow hermits.

And you don't get matched except by Eharmony, which at its cheapest is like, $60 a month. And yeah, that coworker I think is going about it in the least unromantic way possible. My bf congratulated him on his engagement and he was like, "Well you know, I'm not getting any younger..."

You're otherwise looking up cute people, reading witty/lame messages, and otherwise getting to know people without the pressure of having to face them in person wondering if they want to date you at all. You're on a dating site, you're obviously there to date people.

I found my bf* because I thought he was cute, he was a computer geek (which I think is hot), and he had a profile name I could comment on right away. So I messaged him. Would I have done that in real life? Hells no!

*unless you ask him, in which case he'll claim that he messaged me first. Plenty of Fish unfortunately deletes messages older than 2 weeks, so the facts of our first message are long gone.

 

[Erzengel]

No I really mean it. Like I've hit it off with girls online before, but in person, we were both like different people and it didn't feel the same. That's why its always been a bigger priority to me to talk to a girl face to face first before anything if I like her. Like I wouldn't ask a girl out online or via text. Granted, I have not been very open or outgoing in the past, but that's something I'm working on changing, especially now that I feel much better about myself.

But I will say this, if things don't work out this year, meaning I don't change and don't even meet or talk to any girls at all, then I will give online dating a chance. But for the time being, I haven't lost hope that things will turn out the way I hope.

But on a dating site, you are looking to date. If you are meeting them through Facebook, etc., it's a little different.

And you can be talking to more than 1 girl at a time, AND after getting to know them, then you go on a date, and even then it's not set in stone. You can or can not go on a second date.

 

[SpideyVille]

That's what I thought too, until I determined that I was just too weird and maybe if I met 100 new people a month I'd find someone. But I'm a hermit - I'm lucky if I meet 5 new people a month, and I'm shy so I don't put myself out there and show off how awesome I am anyway. The people you'd meet walking around are probably not shy and probably not fellow hermits.

Well yeah, I've been a pretty big hermit too, and somewhat anti-social. But as I've become more comfortable with myself, I've realized that this is not who I really am and its more of a product of my upbringing. My mother was overly strict and paranoid and never really encouraged going out or making friend, so this is the only life I've ever known. But that's been the biggest thing that frustrates me because its the reason why my life isnt what I wish it was. So even though its easier to date nonline, I know that whats best for me is to learn how to go out into the real world and become a person on my own. Most people who see me for the first time think I have this very active and social lifestyle and I don't think that's by mistake.

You're otherwise looking up cute people, reading witty/lame messages, and otherwise getting to know people without the pressure of having to face them in person wondering if they want to date you at all. You're on a dating site, you're obviously there to date people.

I actually took this survey thing online last week that made me sign up for a dating site, and I created a fake account just to see what was out there. And yea I did the same thing, I looked for matches and cute pics, and yeah there were some girls that I would've considered messaging, but it was weird seeing so many girls my age looking for older guys or guys that had to be a certain height.

I guess part of me doesn't feel like that's natural. It's like you're picking someone based on how they are on paper and I guess I just want something a little more personal.

 

[hopefuldreamer]

I just went to eharmony and spent 20 minutes filling out my personality questionnaire:

Ok, I'm off to kill myself. Bye guys

Out of curiosity, I just tried it.

All I can say is that a site that thinks a good match for me is a Welsh Dentist who's passions are Rugby and Cars, is a ******* stupid site

 

[Hound55]

I'm a combination of awkwardly quiet and awkwardly loud, depending on the moment.

My sense of humour beat and devoured my sense of shame long ago though, so it's not really shyness or fear of embarrassment.

 

[Hound55]

Out of curiosity, I just tried it.

All I can say is that a site that thinks a good match for me is a Welsh Dentist who's passions are Rugby and Cars, is a ******* stupid site

You're in, Taffy Jones!

 

[Lily Adler]

Update: He changed his phone number, so the one I have is useless. Oh well back to packing.

 

[Optimus_Prime_]

I'd say my sense of humor is very Ryan Reynolds.

When we went to Suede this weekend for NYE we pooled tickets with groupons. So we ended up using my second for my friends' brother instead of one of the girls we were with. So when i handed him his ticket I said "don't worry, I don't f*** on the first date". I like saying stuff like that, even to girls, especially to girls.

I call one girl "Groupie" because she was embarrassed she danced up on Too $hort while he was performing.

 

[SuperSoldier985]

Ask them if they have any "adequate" matches.

You know, something that'll get you through the next 15-20 years where your only reason for living is because you want to outlast the other person so that you get to be the one who can date again...

That's pretty ****** up...

Try a different site. Try a bunch all at once. Keep every option open.

Well that was the second place I went to. This is what happens when you try to be all too honest about those little personality tests...I already knew I had a very unusual personality but damn you eharmony.com...You have bested me..

 

[SpideyInATree]

eHarmony sucks really bad anyway. Back when I joined it I specifically stated that I didn't want to meet any women who had kids.

On a side note the only girls who had a thing for me had like two or three kids and at the time I could barely take care of myself let alone be getting into a relationship with a woman and her kids.

Anyway...eHarmony kept giving me to women who had kids.

Then I joined match.com and started finding girls without kids. Had a lot of luck with match.com....however, that was like five years ago.

 

[ComicChick]

I just went to eharmony and spent 20 minutes filling out my personality questionnaire:

Ok, I'm off to kill myself. Bye guys

haha now i want to do this questionnaire out of curiousity

 

[ComicChick]

Try a different site. Try a bunch all at once. Keep every option open.

i had to make an okcupid profile for a class assignment and deleted it immediately after

maybe i should make one cuz my lovelife sure aint going anywhere at all :/

 

[Boy Scout]

Update: He changed his phone number, so the one I have is useless. Oh well back to packing.

I'm so sorry.

 

[Anita18]

I guess part of me doesn't feel like that's natural. It's like you're picking someone based on how they are on paper and I guess I just want something a little more personal.

Some people treat it that way (picking people solely on how old or educated or tall they are), and others treat it like a way to meet people who you might not ever meet in person otherwise. I was the latter. Sure I looked at photos, but guys with interesting or well-written profiles I definitely didn't ignore either. If there's one woman doing it, there must be more.

(The REALLY well-written profiles, you might have to watch out for. I went on a couple dates with a guy who was very witty on paper. I'm witty too, given enough time to write out my responses. Turns out like he's exactly like that in real life - just throws out these zingers every second. I'm smart but it was an effin' hard mental exercise keeping up with him. )

There is absolutely no way I would have met my bf in real life, even if we weren't hermits, because we lived 45 minutes apart and didn't usually go out to each other's neck of the woods.

Out of curiosity, I just tried it.

All I can say is that a site that thinks a good match for me is a Welsh Dentist who's passions are Rugby and Cars, is a ******* stupid site

I've heard smokers being matched up with non-smokers who definitely didn't want to date smokers so...yeah I have no idea.

Well that was the second place I went to. This is what happens when you try to be all too honest about those little personality tests...I already knew I had a very unusual personality but damn you eharmony.com...You have bested me..

No you should definitely be honest on them.

Looks like you need to put in some work to do the online dating thing.

i had to make an okcupid profile for a class assignment and deleted it immediately after

maybe i should make one cuz my lovelife sure aint going anywhere at all :/

Oh God, OKCupid...I never made a profile on that site but my coworker is doing the online dating thing and he tried OKCupid since they're more scientific or...something. (We're scientists, it happens.) They do give you a questionnaire but it's not to match people with, it's for profile visitors to get a sense of who you are.

One of the questions was "Would you be in a relationship with someone who had an STD?" Since we're scientists, he figured, "Well, depends on the STD" and picked "yes." He got a message from some chick who was like, "Why would you ever say that? DO YOU HAVE AN STD????"

 

[Hound55]

That's pretty ****** up...

Such is my way...

 

[ComicChick]

 

[HisMagicTrick]

For an ideology like feminism, they sure don’t stab at a woman who prefers to have sex with other women, or mechanical toys but god forbid one of them is sexually turned on by dominant male power, and some how she is deemed a sexual deviant or "gender traitor".

The type of sexual fantasy of Ayn Rand (dominat male badguys) is a shockingly common one. That raw sexual instinct with countless generations of natural selection and adaptation could be so easily changed with a handful of generations groomed on the religion of feminism is silly.

Feminism is a religion, with its own internal culture, devils, angels and internal contradictions.

When feminists call a woman who has a sexual preference for dominant alpha males a "traitor to her gender" it exposes their world view, as gender warfare, AND it also sounds morbidly familiar to a neo Nazi calling a "race traitor", as they view the world in racial warfare.
When an ideology has been taken too far the former leaders become perpetual "cause industry’ executives always thumping a cause and beating a dead horse, because that is how they make a living, and they know no other trade.

Then they start to get silly. It is one thing to insist that a woman not be bought and sold as a mans property, and that she too should be allowed to have education, own property etc…

But when they insist that a woman not be allowed to have a sexual preference for any specific type of men, or type of sexual urges, they have crossed a line into being hypocrites in the extreme.

For men reading this, take note, if you want to be a sycophant to feminism, and always ask permission and apologize to women for even being male, because you have been taught (brain washed) that is the right thing to do, then welcome to a life long journey of celibacy.

What's wrong with wanting to have sex with other women? They were talking about rape, which (maybe it's just me) but that is a lot worse than two women consenting to having sex. Plus, there's a difference between wanting to be dominated by a man, and wanting to be raped.

Oh, and I think you might be confusing 'feminism' with 'radical feminism'. Feminists believe in equality of the genders, which means they would not expect a man to apologize for being a man. They don't think one gender should be superior to the other. Radical feminists, if I'm not mistaken, share most of the views you wrote.

 

[Boy Scout]

I don't want to live in a society where girl-on-girl isn't encouraged.

 

[ComicChick]

so for giggles i did the eharmony profile. man that thing is long and it gave me 7 matches

but i can't see them unless i subscribe

 

[Anita18]

so for giggles i did the eharmony profile. man that thing is long and it gave me 7 matches

but i can't see them unless i subscribe

That's exactly how they get your money.

Now I'm curious how many matches I'll get!

 

[Poeman]

Btw, I work with a few people who have met others through the internet and are now married and getting children.

I used to have a negative approach towards it...But alot of people use it now

 

[Spider-Who?]

I'll admit that I've tried the online thing. Been acing a dry spell lately. I don't really have time to meet a lot of different people these days, and those who I have met were duds, so I figured I'd give it a shot. Signed up to match.com last spring. It's been a total waste. There's only been a handful of girls who I would even consider to go on a date with based on their profiles, but naturally, no bueno. I'm a pretty good looking guy, my profile is fairly intelligent and straight forward, I'm an artist and musician, i make great money for someone my age...what's not to like? Maybe I'm doing it wrong.

 

[Hound55]

so for giggles i did the eharmony profile. man that thing is long and it gave me 7 matches

but i can't see them unless i subscribe

I'm fairly certain that not only would eHarmony not give me any matches, I believe it would likely try to set me up with a web-site for vasectomies so they could remove my seed from the pool.

 

[SpideyVille]

so for giggles i did the eharmony profile. man that thing is long and it gave me 7 matches

but i can't see them unless i subscribe

I just did the same and got 7 matches as well, but about 4-5 that are really close to my location.