The Relationship Thread: Because Superhero Forums are Full of Sexperts! - - - - - - - - - - Part 29

[Erzengel]

See Chicken Little?

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

I have had many a years of adventures being a man ****e but as of these last few years I am just not into the whole dating thing right now. Don't get me wrong it would be nice to have someone but I have always been a one night stand kind of guy. I'm really focused on getting my license fixed right now and then getting a car and I don't want to waste any money messing with females right now (they tend to be expensive in my experience) and I also have a nasty habit of buying all kinds of crap I don't need but want and a girl would cut into that. Also I am not really sure where to find a good female at either, being sober now and not going to bars/clubs I find it weird just initiating a conversation with a random stranger. I tried the online dating stuff (POF, Tinder, etc.) but due to my weight gain from the medication I take it just seems like those kinds of places aren't how I am going to meet a girl that would have to live up to my impossibly high standards. I'm used to a certain hotness level in the women I hook up with and I don't feel I should have to lower my standards and besides if I am not attracted to a female I'm pretty sure my equipment won't let me handle business haha. I intend on getting a personal trainer and losing weight once I get a car but that's more for me. I'm actually completely fine being alone and I rather enjoy it since it is how I have spent the majority of my adult life. Don't think there is really any point to this post just felt like sharing

 

[Erzengel]

Not everyone needs to be in a relationship, but I can't help but get the feeling it doesn't sound like you've ever been in a long term monogamous relationship.

 

[Anita18]

Well, it doesn't sound like DJ cares to either. -shrug-

 

[Erzengel]

For the most part, although, again wonder if it's a byproduct of never really having a relationship.

 

[Anita18]

For the most part, although, again wonder if it's a byproduct of never really having a relationship.

How so?

I'm my husband's first serious gf and he didn't care for one-night stands. He was just picky. And an introverted hermit.

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

So we talked and lo and behold she preempted ME. She still wants to be with me and I agreed to be a little looser with her spontaneous nature.

Sounds good... t:

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Not everyone needs to be in a relationship, but I can't help but get the feeling it doesn't sound like you've ever been in a long term monogamous relationship.

I've only had 2 gf's longer than a month. My baby mama was over a year and that was a really toxic relationship, I was madly in love with her but she did a real number on me and then I had another girl that was great. We lasted about a year I think but I just got bored with her.

 

[Anita18]

I've only had 2 gf's longer than a month. My baby mama was over a year and that was a really toxic relationship, I was madly in love with her but she did a real number on me and then I had another girl that was great. We lasted about a year I think but I just got bored with her.

DJ actually has a better track record than my hubs. I'm the only person he's dated longer than probably 3 months...

I'd say that most people know what they want. Nell didn't need to be in a stable long-term relationship to know that he wanted one, and neither did my husband. I don't think that someone who casually dates around and goes specifically for the high-maintenance hot chicks simply hasn't "seen the light" yet.

 

[Erzengel]

I said it earlier that not everyone needs to be in a relationship.

However, it's not totally out of the range of possibilities that there can be other outlying reasons why someone's never been in a stable long-term relationship, which was my point.

 

[DJ_KiDDvIcIOUs]

Well one part of me would like to settle down and start a family but the other part of me just wants to buy tons of stuff and play music and do the random hookup thing. One thing I do know is that I'm okay with me so I don't need the validation of another person to determine my self worth. Like the old saying goes you can't love someone else if you don't love yourself.

 

[Anita18]

Well one part of me would like to settle down and start a family but the other part of me just wants to buy tons of stuff and play music and do the random hookup thing. One thing I do know is that I'm okay with me so I don't need the validation of another person to determine my self worth. Like the old saying goes you can't love someone else if you don't love yourself.

Well, since one option means your decisions affect other people (including kids), and one option doesn't, I suggest you wait until you're ready for the responsibility. I mean, you already mentioned your baby mama, so you have some experience in the first option technically....

 

[DarkSentinel]

I'm beginning to think I'm nothing more than a Stage 5 Clinger. I haven't seen her in 2 weeks, barely talked to her in the past 3 days, and as a result can barely eat, I don't sleep, and to top it off I go through massive emotional swings to the point of irrationality. Plus borderline paranoia. She says she works a lot, and I believe her because I've seen what she does, but part of me thinks she's seeing someone else.

Maybe I'm just broken. Countless rejections and only two "relationships" that barely lasted four months just have me doubting that I'm good enough, for this or any girl.

 

[Reek]

maybe you should simply ask her. be straight forward. if she gets mad, **** it. you tried.

 

[DarkSentinel]

I want to, but I don't want to lose this girl...god****ingdammit, WHY do I have to be such a sap?

 

[DarkSentinel]

**** it. I'm just gonna fulfill this self-fulfilling prophecy and get it over with. Nothing good is supposed to happen to me anyway so the least I can do is get my ****ing Ambrose hoodie back.

 

[Reek]

if politely asking her a question loses her... than that says it all.

 

[DarkSentinel]

I wrote out the text I intend on sending her in my Notes (thank God for that app)..if I don't hear from her by Sunday when I get out of work, then I'll send it.

 

[SpideyVille]

I think it's over for my and my "girlfriend" ... I thought I could be there for her, but as time has continued to pass on, I've began to see clearly several issues she has. I knew she had ADHD, but I've started seeing rapid mood swings in her, where we'll be fine one minute but arguing like crazy people the next. We had a talk earlier this week and both agreed there's a strong possibility that she may also be bipolar.

I'm just so hurt right now because I can give my opinion about something, but she takes it so personally in ways that don't even make sense, and she will always defend everyone else except me. And there's always a fight, and I've beginning to come to terms with the fact that she won't ever change, and she gives me absolutely no reason to have faith that she will succeed in anything on her own.

 

[DarkSentinel]

At least your girl actually talks to you.

 

[Anita18]

I'm beginning to think I'm nothing more than a Stage 5 Clinger. I haven't seen her in 2 weeks, barely talked to her in the past 3 days, and as a result can barely eat, I don't sleep, and to top it off I go through massive emotional swings to the point of irrationality. Plus borderline paranoia. She says she works a lot, and I believe her because I've seen what she does, but part of me thinks she's seeing someone else.

Maybe I'm just broken. Countless rejections and only two "relationships" that barely lasted four months just have me doubting that I'm good enough, for this or any girl.

I think my husband had that exact track record before he met me. I still think there's hope for you.

But if she's busy with work, she isn't going to change if she's in a relationship with you. You're going to have to learn to trust her - not about cheating, but that you're still important to her even if she's busy with work. You're going to have to learn to handle yourself.

It works with my marriage because both of us are workaholic nerds.

I think it's over for my and my "girlfriend" ... I thought I could be there for her, but as time has continued to pass on, I've began to see clearly several issues she has. I knew she had ADHD, but I've started seeing rapid mood swings in her, where we'll be fine one minute but arguing like crazy people the next. We had a talk earlier this week and both agreed there's a strong possibility that she may also be bipolar.

I'm just so hurt right now because I can give my opinion about something, but she takes it so personally in ways that don't even make sense, and she will always defend everyone else except me. And there's always a fight, and I've beginning to come to terms with the fact that she won't ever change, and she gives me absolutely no reason to have faith that she will succeed in anything on her own.

Some relationships can work that way, if one partner is okay with (or even likes) babying the other, but if you want an equal partner and she refuses to try to change or even see that she might have issues, that's an incompatibility that can't be overcome.

 

[the last son]

@sentinel and Spidey I think it's over for both. Sentinel you have to be strong and move on. Haven't seen her in two weeks? It's over. Trust me. You don't want her anyway.

The woman I've dated for past month are spending as much time as we can with each other before she moves away next month. I almost want to end it now because the more time we spend together the harder the break up will be. She insist on us hanging though before she moves. I'm just enjoying the ride til it's over.

 

[Erzengel]

Dark Sentinel

This girl that you're with, might be pretty, fun, smart etc., but she may not be the one for you. It might be her and not you. You need someone who gives you more attention and honestly you seem to need it.

Spideville

This was your first real relationship and 1st relationships don't always work out. It's through dating that you learn things about yourself and what you want and if things aren't working out now and you both are trying then maybe things aren't meant to be.

 

[Black Narcissus]

Tell me what I did wrong.

Jessica Simpson (she was fat during this evening)


It has been awhile since my last confession. Gather round lads.

One hot summer day, we were both at the local Sheets pumping gas. I was filling my truck, so I had plenty of time to kill.

I was pumping gas into my motorized vehicle. She strolled up to me and placed her hand on my pump hand. "Didn't I meet you on a summer cruise?" She asked, in that wistful, Dallas City way, suggestive of bacchanal. My body seized up. Every muscle was taut, yet her eyes slid into the back of her fake blonde head.

I approached closer.

"Perhaps you think I deserve a spanking?" She suggested. My head nodded imperceptibly at first, then shook violently.

"Well," I said, after taking a long, lazy drag on my clove cigarette, the kind that lovers do on the eve of Gotterdammerung, "I just made some cherry kool-aide back home. And I've got oreos. If you've got that hankering, why don't you drop by." I slipped her my card, then strode back to my truck. My big Monster truck.

She never did show up.

 

[ThePhantasm]

I wrote out the text I intend on sending her in my Notes (thank God for that app)..if I don't hear from her by Sunday when I get out of work, then I'll send it.

You should talk to her. Communicating your feelings via text is a very bad idea.