The Relationship Thread: Because Superhero Forums are Full of Sexperts! - - Part 31

[InCali]

I generally wear my heart on my sleeve so anything I do will be genuine and honest. But just the fact that I'm this nervous is surprising to me, because I've been on plenty of dates the past few years without any nerves. I guess its just the fact that the last 6 years have gone from her being taken, to me being taken, back to her being taken and now that I'm *very* single, just the thought of actually going on a date with a person the universe has deemed unattainable for the majority of my adult life is kind of nerve wracking.

I know the feeling well. There was a woman I was madly in love with for years and I let her know about it. She always seemed to be with someone else. I was always nice to her and never got frustrated, but god was I nervous around her. She was a Mariachi, ultra smart (she used to make money on the side by researching papers for grad students at UC Santa Cruz and once told me "I oughta have about 10 PH.D.s LOL) and drop dead gorgeous. One day I was walking down the mall in Santa Cruz. She walked up to me, grabbed me by the arm, and said "I need a date". She drug me (willingly) to a lesbian bar down the street because it was close or she thought it would be funny....I never asked. That started a relationship that lasted for quite some time, but she ended up somewhere in Salinas because of family stuff and we lost touch. Unfortunately, she was killed in a car crash a few years ago. Miss her. Here's a copy of an old picture of her around the time I first met her.

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

I would probably text her, ask her how her vacation went, and see when she's available. When 2 people leave things up to the other person, you know what happens?

True, but another opportunity has since presented itself and I feel I made all the effort the previous time so now it’s her turn if you get me?

 

[InCali]

True, but another opportunity has since presented itself and I feel I made all the effort the previous time so now it’s her turn if you get me?

If you aren't interested, don't call her, but this sounds like some game playing.

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

If you aren't interested, don't call her, but this sounds like some game playing.

I would say I am interested to a point but question her interest level after she ghosted me last time. I am not intending to play games as I hate them, so apologies if it comes across that way. I just don’t want to be someone’s back up or side piece.

 

[InCali]

I would say I am interested to a point but question her interest level after she ghosted me last time. I am not intending to play games as I hate them, so apologies if it comes across that way. I just don’t want to be someone’s back up or side piece.

That sounds like a lot of guess work/questions. For me, I like to get to the bottom of things and if it means I do the heavy lifting, so be it.

Different strokes I guess.

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

That sounds like a lot of guess work/questions. For me, I like to get to the bottom of things and if it means I do the heavy lifting, so be it.

Different strokes I guess.

Yeah I get you, but if it’s someone I really don’t know the reasons aren’t overly important, but to me their level of interest is at that stage, we’ll see I guess.

 

[Flash525]

@AVEITWITHJAMON listen to your gut dude. It's rarely wrong. Ones intuition can be a useful tool.

 

[RetrogradeOrbit]

What @Flash525 said...

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

@AVEITWITHJAMON listen to your gut dude. It's rarely wrong. Ones intuition can be a useful tool.

What @Flash525 said...

Yep, have found that over the years to be true. I lose nothing leaving the ball in her court.

 

[InCali]

Yep, have found that over the years to be true. I lose nothing leaving the ball in her court.

My gut is way stupider than my head. if something is off, I can almost always pinpoint it.

You lose nothing if you wouldn't otherwise develop a relationship.

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

My gut is way stupider than my head. if something is off, I can almost always pinpoint it.

You lose nothing if you wouldn't otherwise develop a relationship.

My gut has been wrong in the past I will admit. But it's been right a lot also so I tend to go with it.

 

[MissMarvelous]

I was excited about this new tv show on Netflix: Sexy Beasts (mind you: I've never bothered to read the description of the show) and I thought it was something like the Grimm. Let me tell you: it's not.

The idea is cool but I turned the TV off a little after the last reveal. Here's the thing: you have the man/woman who will share 3 dates with 3 different candidates. After the first date, one of the candidates gets the pork chop and same happens after the second date. All the four of them are wearing prosthetic masks and make up, so you have NOT a clue what they look like! This way, the candidates are being rejected or selected based on their personality traits, which is great.

Let me tell you, it's BS. All of them are gorge!!! Why?

 

[AVEITWITHJAMON]

My gut has been wrong in the past I will admit. But it's been right a lot also so I tend to go with it.

That girl never messaged me back so onwards with my life I go. As always I will be polite and chatty if I see her again, but beyond that I am done.

 

[Flash525]

Let me tell you, it's BS. All of them are gorge!!! Why?

What do you mean? Gorgeous?

The sad truth to this is that ultimately there's going to be that reveal, and attractive people hook in soulless viewers.

It's also said attractive people who oddly have vanity issues and sign up to these shows in the first place, that or they're scouted by agents and are dissatisfied with their life that much that they just go for it - insecurities.

 

[Erzengel]

It would be truly effed up to have average people sign up for that show only for them to have their hearts broken during the reveal. So having beautiful people (while subjective) is playing the odds.

 

[MissMarvelous]

What do you mean? Gorgeous?

yes, "gorgeous" people! I swear they all are.

It's in London BTW. I mean, the show. And they go to the pub in full masks/costume, which is funny.

The sad truth to this is that ultimately there's going to be that reveal, and attractive people hook in soulless viewers.

The first lady that had to choose her "sexy beast" said that she was tired of being chased after her looks and was hoping for a change

 

[Flash525]

It would be truly effed up to have average people sign up for that show only for them to have their hearts broken during the reveal. So having beautiful people (while subjective) is playing the odds.

But they can have their hearts broken on a reveal anyway. Love is surely about more than ones appearance.

The first lady that had to choose her "sexy beast" said that she was tired of being chased after her looks and was hoping for a change.

Well she's in for a shock once she realises the vanity of her counterparts.

 

[MissMarvelous]

Well she's in for a shock once she realises the vanity of her counterparts.

Honest to Gawd, the level of vanity is skyrocketing!!! One would think that they are in for the "inside" but they are not... and they look like this:

 

[Flash525]

@MissMarvelous that just looks laughable - and you CHOSE to watch it?

 

[MissMarvelous]

@MissMarvelous that just looks laughable - and you CHOSE to watch it?

Well, yeah... I get bored from time to time! But I'm watching Roswell, now.

 

[Erzengel]

But they can have their hearts broken on a reveal anyway. Love is surely about more than ones appearance.

It is but call me jaded, but I don't see someone who's attractive especially if they are male, seeing the woman they felt a connection with who's plain Jane looking and being okay. Vice versa, maybe a little more realistic since I see that more often.

 

[Flash525]

It is but call me jaded, but I don't see someone who's attractive especially if they are male, seeing the woman they felt a connection with who's plain Jane looking and being okay. Vice versa, maybe a little more realistic since I see that more often.

I'm far from knowledgable on the subject, but if said person is looking for someone for the night, then sure, this logic holds, but if someone is looking for someone to spend their life with, there's gotta be chemistry and that connection.

I'm sure it isn't always the case, but if social media is any example (and I know, social media should be taken with a pinch of salt), those people that would be defined as 9's and 10's are more often than not 1's and 2's where intelligence factor in. The problem is, and this goes for guys as well as girls, those people that think (or know) that they're good looking normally are too self absorbed that they don't care about anyone else, and/or they believe the world revolves around them and they're quite frankly as thick as pig poop when it comes to common awareness or the simplicities of life.

 

[Erzengel]

I'm not familiar with the show but I doubt they have this 2 month long connection that allows a relationship to blossom. I think it's a few dates. So, I really doubt it's that long. Further, dating in the pandemic, I've heard of stories of people losing interest in people once they pulled their masks down.

 

[Flash525]

That's precisely my point though; people are being judged by their masks. It doesn't matter whether it's an organic one or not, or whether it's just an attractive face. That's not who a person is, it's what they look like (in some cases, only for a period of time).

There's still got to be something wrong with you for signing up to a show like this, and the agents tasked with acquiring a certain range of people know exactly who they're looking for - the naive and the gullible. Easier to make entertainment out of them.

 

[MissMarvelous]

the naive and the gullible.

In this case, it's the audience. Not the contestants.