Attack of the *Official* Relationship Advice Thread

[Anubis]

Which is psychotic.

 

[steintym]

"If I can't have you, nobody can" ... That starts entering into some freaky territory.

 

[enterthemadness]

Time for some laughs....

One time at Hooters, my friend was bugging me, wanting me^ to ask out our waitress...who I had kindergarden with...first time I took it...and so I give her my number...and when she goes away to put our money in waitresses cash register..she looks and turns at me^...giving me^ this nasty look. Like a "How dare YOU give me^ your number."

This depressing story was bought to you by ETM. He's like the puppy dog version of JAL.

 

[terry78]

I'm sure you ****ed it up somehow.

 

[Anubis]

Yeah, what you shoulda said is, "Hey, wanna go out? Catch up? I don't eat paste anymore, how about you?"

 

[WillardNation]

I got a Hooters' waitress' number one time. We talked a little bit but we never went because she lived in a different town and I could never make it down there. I was happy to disprove the whole "you can never get a date at Hooters" thing though.

 

[terry78]

Now Tilted Kilt is a whole other ball game. They just throw it at you in there.

 

[ComicChick]

Yeah, what you shoulda said is, "Hey, wanna go out? Catch up? I don't eat paste anymore, how about you?"

he can still use that line

 

[WillardNation]

Now Tilted Kilt is a whole other ball game. They just throw it at you in there.

Tilted whatnow? I've never heard of this place.

 

[Anubis]

It's a chain of Scottish Pubs.

I wonder if all the bar maids have to fake an Scottish Accent......

 

[terry78]

Tilted whatnow? I've never heard of this place.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tilted_Kilt

Grasshopper, the master is about to become the student.

 

[Anubis]

he can still use that line

Any line would be better than slipping a number in with the check.

Well, any line except "I want you to oil up and put me in a head lock with your legs!"

 

[enterthemadness]

....I'm never gonna live that down...never...think it's time for a vacation...

 

[HisMagicTrick]

^^

 

[enterthemadness]

....a long vacation..see ya all in Jan for next Survivor...

 

[ComicChick]

we'll see you around tomorrow

 

[SpideyVille]

 

[Anubis]

Own your perversions. It's the key to a happy life.

 

[WillardNation]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tilted_Kilt

Grasshopper, the master is about to become the student.

I see. I wouldn't mind checking one out sometime.

So I've got a date on Friday. Super cute girl I met through a friend. I've been thinking and I've decided I'm going to really try to get over my whole only being attracted to unavailable women thing and see if I can't maybe get something substantial out of this one. If she's actually cool, that is. Which, for the past couple of hours we've been talking about superpowers so she's off to a good start....

 

[Hound55]

Any line would be better than slipping a number in with the check.

Well, any line except "I want you to oil up and put me in a head lock with your legs!"

Hell, even that line gets things all out in the open for a start...

If she sticks around, unlikely as it may be, then that fish just jumped straight into the boat...

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

Time for some laughs....

One time at Hooters, my friend was bugging me, wanting me^ to ask out our waitress...who I had kindergarden with...first time I took it...and so I give her my number...and when she goes away to put our money in waitresses cash register..she looks and turns at me^...giving me^ this nasty look. Like a "How dare YOU give me^ your number."

Are you like that guy who facebook friends everyone from his highschool and elementary school, even if you never talked to any of them? How would you even recognize someone from Kindergarten? No one at 25 looks even remotely the same as they did at 5 (well okay, to a mother maybe). She probably thought you were some random. And even if she knew you attended Kindergarten with her ... YOU'RE STILL JUST SOME GUY WHO ATTENDED KINDERGARTEN WITH HER!!

 

[DarthDaveBanner]

I think I may sue the writers of 500 Days of Summer for copying my life!

.....or sue my life for copying the movie.

 

[Charlie Boy]

I have a bit of a crush on a co-worker of mine. I know the saying well, "Don't **** where you eat.", which I don't plan on doing.

I want something real with this girl. She's smart, sensible, generous, and witty. I want a shot at something real, and I'd hate to miss out on that just because we happen to work in the same building... Honestly, I see this girl for about 20 solid minutes a week. She's part time, I'm full-time, and we work in separate departments. It just seems silly to overlook a great woman because we happen to work under the same roof.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

I think I may sue the writers of 500 Days of Summer for copying my life!

.....or sue my life for copying the movie.

I still need to see that film (I guess. I heard it's decent).


I have no movie to sue. Maybe Kickass for inspiring all these d-bags who pretend to be costumed heroes, but never actually do anything heroic except talk about their imaginary exploits online and drink more Mountain Dew than is physically safe for the human digestive-tract to process.

Also, The English Patient. It knows what it did.

 

[JJJ's Ulcer]

I have a bit of a crush on a co-worker of mine. I know the saying well, "Don't **** where you eat.", which I don't plan on doing.

I want something real with this girl. She's smart, sensible, generous, and witty. I want a shot at something real, and I'd hate to miss out on that just because we happen to work in the same building... Honestly, I see this girl for about 20 solid minutes a week. She's part time, I'm full-time, and we work in separate departments. It just seems silly to overlook a great woman because we happen to work under the same roof.

Co-worker relationships are fine. Unless you have a bad break up. Then things can get awkward. Also, one-time hook-ups with co-workers are bad ideas (I'm sure WillardNation will disagree), because y'know gossip.